Page 71 of Hard Luck (Blackstone House)

“We weren’t talking loudly.” I never talked loudly in environments like this one. “She has sharper ears than the NSA.”

“So, if buttholes are out, I guess we’d better talk about something else.”

“If buttholes are out, I believe the technical term is ‘a prolapse.’”

“Stawp.” He rolled his eyes. “Where are you heading to for your vacation?”

I raised my voice a tad. “I was on my way to Climax, North Carolina, when I took a wrong turn at the airport.” Yes, she was still listening, and I was surprised she didn’t have deeper wrinkles with all that frowning she did. “The earplugs only work if you put them in, sweetie.”

When she didn’t make a move to open the package, I scooched closer to Cole, my amusement fading. Why couldn’t people mind their own damn business?

“I’d make a joke about Intercourse, Pennsylvania,” hesaid, “but that would hardly be appropriate given the circumstances.”

“This is such a mess,” I muttered.

“It is,” he agreed, putting his arm around me. It wasn’t that he was pushing boundaries, more that there was nowhere else for it to comfortably sit. I leaned my head on his shoulder, and my stupid eyes started prickling. Dammit.

“I don’t know where I’m going,” I told him, trying to distract myself from impending doom. I was here under false pretences. So many secrets…

“Miami?” he suggested. “Or are you flying on somewhere else?”

“So it turns out my friends are all on Team Cole. I was supposed to be meeting one of them in the Keys for a break, except it turns out she’s not even in Florida, and what they actually did was book me a flight to San Gallicano. They sent me the ticket for the second leg as I boarded.”

The plane reached the runway, and after a brief pause, gathered speed. Cole’s arm tightened as we roared into the air.

“You’re not a fan of flying?” I asked.

“Not until today.” His voice was tight. “I realise I haven’t met your friends, but I like them already.”

“Do you want them? I’m not sure I do anymore.”

Oh, the irony—they’d lied, and it hurt. I was lying to Cole, and I didn’t wanthimto get hurt.

“Spending time with me is that bad?”

I sighed. “Of course not. It’s just complicated, that’s all.”

“I like you, you like me. What’s complicated about that?”

When he put it that way, it sounded so simple, although in reality it was anything but.

“I struggle with connection,” I admitted. “Not the initial part, the ongoing part. It’s like I have a pot of coins, andevery social interaction costs me.” Around the Choir, I was relaxed. I could be myself. On a job, I was focused. The rare moments of respite when I wasn’t at the Cathouse or working were the problem. In those breathers, I had to be constantly on my guard. “The thing between us had an expiration date, so it didn’t matter if I spent like a lottery winner. I blew everything in two weeks, and now I’m broke.”

“Use your vacation to recharge.”

“It’s not that simple. And I’m also a very private person.”

“I’m beginning to understand that.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to let you in. It’s that I can’t.”

“I wasn’t asking for marriage and kids.”

“I know. I just…panicked.”

“That’s the last thing I wanted.” He stroked his thumb over my shoulder soothingly. “You’re tired. I can see it in your face.”

“I barely slept last night.”

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