Page 4 of The Nutcracker

Jillian raised her eyebrows as though instantly intrigued and seemingly ready to take up Grandma’s challenge. “Okay. Um… how long is the Golden Gate Bridge?”

“Well, the actual ‘span’ of the bridge is considered to be the section between the two towers… which is one thousand, two-hundred-and-eighty meters. But if you include the sections of the bridge beyond the span then the answer is two thousand, seven-hundred-and-thirty-seven meters. In metric measurements, of course.”

“Oh wow, you really are an engineer.”

“I was… in Chicago. I’ve moved back to…” I couldn’t quite find the right words.

“To what, dear?” asked Grandma.

I took her by the hand. “To keep you company.”

“Well, Marjorie’s very lucky to have a grandson like you.” Jillian thought a moment and added, “Although I don’t imagine there’s an awful lot of work for an architectural engineer here in Coopers Mill.”

“There isn’t,” was the short answer.

Chapter Three

My grandmother could remember Mr. Hanover’s toy shop…

She could remember a recipe for pumpkin pie that Mrs. Pritchard had pinched.

She could even remember the prize of a gift voucher at Howard’s Haberdashery.

But she couldn’t remember the love of her life.

If Christmas wishes came true, that was all I wished for her.

I wished that my grandmother would remember that my grandfather was more than a stranger who liked her roasted chestnuts.

I wished she could see his face, feel his presence, whisper his name, just once…

“Jerry.”

Chapter Four

“Welcome to Hippo Hamburgers, may I take your order?”

An eighteen-wheel logging truck hauling a full load roared down the interstate, drowning out the order on the other end of the drive-thru speaker.

I asked for the order again. “I’m sorry, I couldn’t quite hear that. Could you repeat your order please?”

There was a grumble and a muffled “fuck, seriously?” in my earpiece. I wish I had have recognized the voice then, but there was no hope with another truck tearing down the highway. I caught the order… just. Two regular hippo burgers, a side of wings and two extra large shakes. The car turned down the icy drive-thru and stopped at my window.

That’s when I saw him…

Which is when I pretended not to see him…

Or at least recognize him.

I kept my eyes down and turned to bag up the food.

His engine revved… just like it did when we were kids. I remember the guttural hum and splutter of it as we made out in his car, parked in the dark of the trees on the far side of the bleechers.

We kissed like it was the last kiss we’d ever get.

We held each other like we’d never let go.

I sucked him off, and when he was done…