Page 2 of The Nutcracker

“Who? Why would someone else cook for me? I’m more than capable of cooking my own food.”

“Grandma, we’ve had this chat. You’re moving into Cedar Village now.”

“Cedar Village? What’s Cedar Village.”

“It’s like a hotel. The people who work there are going to cook for you. They’ll make your bed in the mornings and bring you your tea in the afternoon and fetch you your blanket when you need it. They’re very nice people. And you’ll make lots of friends. Mrs. Pritchard lives there too. You can play cards together and take walks through the garden when spring comes. You remember Mrs. Pritchard?”

“Well of course I do! She pinched my pumpkin pie recipe and ended up raising more money than anyone at the bake sale. She got a gift voucher at Howard’s Haberdashery and for what? For cheating, I tell you.”

And there was the clarity again. “Okay, so maybe we won’t be playing cards with Mrs. Pritchard.”

“She probably cheats at that too.”

“Never mind Mrs. Pritchard. You’ll make other friends. And I’ll visit you every day. I’m here to stay now.”

“Nonsense. What about your life back in Chicago? And that nice man of yours, what’s his name again?”

That nice man’s name was Liam, and Liam turned out to be a lying son-of-a-bitch who was cheating on me for the last three months of our relationship. For once I was glad my grandmother couldn’t recall a name. I couldn’t even muster up the strength to say it.

“Never mind all that. I’ve moved all my things back into the house, I’ve been there three months already. I’ll take good care of everything for you.”

“Just promise me you’ll watch that second step on the porch, it needs fixing. Remind me to call Mr. Evans the handyman when it’s time for me to come back home.”

I clenched my jaw.

I held my breath.

I did all the little things I had learned to do to keep my eyes from welling up.

Then, when I was sure I’d held the tears at bay, I simply nodded. “I’ll remind you. I’ll be careful on the steps till then.”

My grandmother smiled.

She turned her gaze back to the shops and signs and snow-capped lamp posts that passed us by.

I thought about the house. I wondered how long I might be staying in Coopers Mill. I had arrived back in town in early autumn, slowly watching my grandmother’s mental health deteriorate in that time, slowly surrendering to the painful truth that I needed to relocate her life to Cedar Village. It was a decision I had not made lightly. There had been much jaw-clenching and breath-holding in the last few months. My grandmother was my world. She was the only family I had now.

I hoped her time at Cedar Village was happy.

I hoped I would be staying in Coopers Mill for longer than I could possibly imagine.

Even though I had spent almost all my savings on signing the paperwork for Cedar Village— even though I had said goodbye to my career in Chicago and everything I had worked so hard for my entire life— I prayed that I would be settling into my grandmother’s house for many Christmases to come.

For there was only one reason I would leave Coopers Mill now…

And that was something that didn’t bear thinking about.

“Of course I know that Maybelle passed,” she said quietly, her thoughts backtracking. She tried to give a light-hearted chuckle, but I could hear the concern in her voice. “You must think I’m a nutty old woman sometimes.”

“Grandma, I don’t think that at all.”

“I know. It’s just sometimes… sometimes I have trouble remembering. Sometimes I wish I could just crack open all those memories and relive them all over again. I wish I could remember it all. But these days it all seems so… distant.”

I patted her hand.

I nodded and held back the tears. “I wish you could remember it all too.”

“Never mind,” she sighed. “Don’t you worry about it. Just be careful of the deer, won’t you? Just watch out for those deer.”

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