Page 29 of Fierce Family

“No, it isn’t,” Nicholas slides his phone into his back pocket as he steps up to us. “Don’t blame yourself. We tried everything we could. This was just a group of teenagers testing boundaries, and it went catastrophically wrong. Gregory is nearly sixteen; he’s old enough to understand right and wrong. You’ve always put your life second and given our boys everything you can. This is not on you. He was difficult even before you and Josh fell for each other. This did not happen because you found some happiness. Do you hear me?”

I nod and a lone tear runs over my cheek. Josh can’t help himself and wipes it away with his thumb. The gentle touch breaks my resolve and I curl back up in his arms.

“I need you to say it Sheila, tell me that you understand this is not your fault,” Nicholas pushes.

“I know,” I sniffle.

“It’s also time for Peter and I to step up. We need to discuss details and plans but Peter and I will move to Fellside so we can be around more and help out.” Nicholas looks completely defeated.

“Nico, it’s not your fault either.”

“I know; still, soon the boys will be off to university and start their own life journeys. I want to be around for these last few years at least,” he shrugs.

“The boys will lov—”

“Mr and Ms Whelan, Gregory has woken up.” A nurse approaches us with a big grin on her face.

“Can we see him?” Nicholas is the first to find his voice.

“Yes, I’ll take you to him,” she waves for us to follow her. Josh lets go of me.

“I’ll wait here,” he mumbles.

“Josh, please. I need you.” I hold out my hand to him. I want him to be a part of this and of our family.

When we enter the room Gregory is looking around, disoriented. There are two other beds in the room, separated from Gregory’s bed by curtains.

“Mum,” he whispers and his weak voice brings tears to my eyes again. It makes me realise how close we came to losing him.

“Hey, Gee,” I say softly and stroke his hair. Nicholas takes Gregory’s hand from the other side of the bed.

“I’m sorry.” The fear in Gregory’s voice is apparent. I’d like to ask him what he was thinking, but now is not the time. We can have that conversation when he’s better.

“I’m just glad you are okay,” I reply. “We all are.”

“Yes, we are,” Nicholas sobs and presses a gentle kiss to Greogry’s forehead. Gregory looks shell-shocked. Kids forget that we worry because we love them and want them safe.

“How did I get here?” he asks, embarrassed, and glances at Josh. Nico tells him about the search and the helicopter rescue. He leaves out the detail of the girl who died. That’s another conversation we can have once we are all over the worst of this initial shock.

“Thanks,” Gregory addresses Josh who just nods.

“Is there anything you need, honey?” You never feel more helpless as a parent then when your child is hurt and you can’t make it better.

“I’m quite thirsty.”

“I’ll get some water.” Josh gently slides his hand over my back before leaving us to it.

“I know you’re happy I’m okay but I’m still in trouble, aren’t I?” Gregory asks sheepishly.

“We definitely need to talk … when you’re better. But the most important thing for us is that you’re okay.” Nico replies and presses another kiss to his forehead. Indeed, this will be a tough conversation to have, and as parents, all we can hope for is that he learns from this. But we'll never have any guarantees, and that thought terrifies me.

Josh

I bang the vending machine to shift the bottle of water that’s got stuck. It drops down with a thud and I retrieve it from the tray. I walk back into Gee’s room with three coffees in one hand and the bottle of water in the other and find him alone.

“The doctor needed to talk to them,” he answers my unspoken question. “They should be back soon.”

“I got you some water and some crackers.” I place the tray with the coffees on the bedside table and pull the crackers from my jacket pocket.

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