Page 43 of Take What You Want

Chester smiles at me with dollar signs in his eyes but wishes me luck nonetheless. Without sparing Liam another glance, I stride out of Chester’s office feeling ten pounds lighter. Yes, trepidation churns in my gut, but I’ve been needing a change. And that loser strolling in here and taking away my sense of comfort at my job was the kick I needed.

I could just quit. Say fuck you to Chester, to Liam, to all the other men who work here putting half the effort Hallie and I do but are lauded more than us. But job security is too important to me. If something goes wrong in LA, I don’t want to be in the position where I’m starting from scratch.

My backup plans have backup plans, so if I can stay on the team here while building connections with Arun until I reach the point where I can completely jump ship, I’m going to do it.

And the steps are finally falling into place.

10

NIKOLAI

It’s been said that I have commitment issues, and I guess it’s a fair assessment. I’m the only one of my friends who doesn’t have any tattoos, was the one who was most hesitant about signing our first contract locking us in for three albums, and after seeing my parents fight my entire life, marriage never appealed to me. It took me years to buy my first home in LA because I didn’t know where I wanted to set down roots.

But it’s also been said that I’m impulsive, and don’t tend to think through my actions before executing them. And that would also be a fair judgment. I’m the one who anyone can call and ask to go do something and I say yes without even knowing the plan. I’ve purchased plane tickets with no other plans in place and figured it out as I touch down in a new country.

The latter has been amplified since the shooting, and the former has grown less and less scary to me.

Life is really fucking short.

Getting a tattoo I’ll eventually regret? Oh well.

Signing a contract? There will always be a loophole somewhere if you have a good enough lawyer.

Buying a house in the wrong location? Put it back on the market.

Marriage? If it’s with the right person…

So when Jane called me a few days ago and asked if she could stay at my house for a bit while she works with Arun to see if she can make a go of things out here, my answer was immediate.

“Yes. Of course you can,”I say, trying to hold back all the nerves that are currently blasting off in my stomach at the idea of her staying under my roof.

“You can take a bit to think it over. I’m not planning to fly out until Saturday.”

“No need.”

“Are you sure?”

“Jane, you’ve always been the one to take three to five business days to make a decision; not me.”

She laughs softly over the line and it dances over my skin like butterfly wings. “You’re right.”

“Say that again? I think the connection cut out.”

“You heard it once. I’m not repeating it again.”

Smiling, I gaze at the sunset bathing the hills in shades of gold and orange. “Text me your flight information and I’ll pick you up.”

“You don’t have?—”

“I know I don’t have to. But I want to.”

“Thank you,” she whispers. “I really appreciate it. I don’t want to intrude on Walker and Scar now that they’re living together, and paying for a short-term lease or a hotel just isn’t really an option?—”

“You don’t have to explain yourself. I’m happy to have you stay with me.”

“You sure?”

“Stop asking me that. My answer isn’t going to change.”