Page 139 of Take What You Want

His fingers tap against some sort of surface in the background, creating a staccato rhythm over the line. “Right? Crazy shit. You can be my plus one for the evening since I’m riding solo to it.”

That makes my ears perk up and I stop packing. I settle on the sad, thin mattress of my dorm room and lean against the wall. “Is anyone else bringing a date?”

“Reid isn’t. That would be too serious of a commitment for him.” He snorts. Yep, sounds like Reid. Hayden was talking about bringing the girl he’s been seeing casually but if you ask me, she kinda sucks so I hope he doesn’t.”

“And Nikolai?” I try to ask as innocently as possible.

“Please, have you forgotten what he’s like? Of course he is.” My stomach plummets to the floor. “He’s bringing his current flavor of the month. I haven’t met her yet, but I’ve sort of stopped paying attention to who he’s seeing anymore. Not worth learning someone’s name when they’re gone the next week already.”

The walls cave in around me. It’s not like this is a surprise. I’ve been sure that Nikolai’s been hooking up with other girls. Why wouldn’t he? He’s single and that’s what he wanted right? That rockstar lifestyle?

But it’s one thing to imagine it, but another to be confronted with it. And I’m going to show up to the party, alone, and have to watch him parade his newest fling around and pretend like it doesn’t bleed me out slowly.

“You still there?” Walker asks.

“Yeah, sorry.” I shake my head and steady my voice. I can’t throw my brother off by pressing for more information or appearing to be upset by the news. “I should go, it’s getting late here. But I’ll send you my flights as soon as we hang up.”

I must be good at hiding my torment because he says, “Sounds good. Love you, Janie. See you tomorrow.”

“Love you, too.” I hang up and drop the phone beside me like a stone.

I don’t know what I thought. It’s not like I was going to show up to the party tomorrow, Nikolai would fall to his knees and beg for my forgiveness, and we’d be back together by the time I fly home.

But the idea of watching him be with someone else makes me physically sick. Here I am, not having dated anyone since I arrived at school because I was still caught up in him, while from the sounds of it, he’s been going through women like T-shirts.

Fuck that.

Before I allow my brain to talk me out of it, I hop off the bed, slip on a pair of sneakers, and walk down the hall of my dormitory. My eyes dance over the passing numbers, looking for one in particular.

I’ve been over here a few times with other students from our classes for small parties. There’s a group of us that have a lot of the same classes, so we’ve formed a bit of a group.

But I’m looking for one in particular.

I knock a few times on that door before stepping back. Fuck, I didn’t even check what I looked like before I stormed over here. I quickly smooth my hands over my hair and glance down at my clothes. I’m in leggings and a university crewneck. Not the best, but not the worst.

I shift from foot to foot, waiting for an answer. Maybe he’s out. That would make sense. He’s social and fairly popular on campus already. I’m just about to abandon this crazy idea when the door suddenly swings open, revealing a bare-chested Liam.

“Jane,” he says, surprise lifting his brows. “Hey, how’s it going?”

I take a deep breath before I raise my chin and ask, “Are you busy this weekend?”

Nikolai

“I can’t believe how many people are here.” Reid usually plays it cool, hiding his excitement under a mask of indifference, but he’s almost bouncing on his toes as the party kicks off.

“Absolutely insane,” I agree as I scan the party. The label rented out an entire restaurant/bar situation downtown and they didn’t spare any expenses. Neon lights cover the walls, casting the room is a hazy, cool glow. Our album artwork is everywhere you look. The band logo is stamped into the buns of the sliders being served and the cocktail napkins littering every surface.

“I can’t believe this is all for us,” he says in a dreamlike state.

I wish I could be soaking it in like he is, but my attention keeps getting pulled to the door every time it opens. She’s supposed to be coming tonight. She wouldn’t miss this for Walker.

But almost an hour into the party and I haven’t seen her yet. I’m tempted to ask Walker, but he’s been busy going around the room with Arun as they build connections with other industry people tonight. We have an official manager, but Walker still serves as the mouthpiece for the four of us.

Hayden meanders over to us with a drink. They aren’t carding any of us tonight. “What are you looking for?”

“What?”

“You look like you’re looking for something. Did you end up inviting Becca?”