Page 58 of Take What You Want

“She’s coming tonight, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Then she still cares, man. You know she does.”

I let out a harsh laugh. “I don’t want to spook her.”

“Fuck that.”

“What?”

He faces me. “I’ve had to listen to you bitch about her for years, and now that she’s under your roof, you’re going to tiptoe around things?”

The entire time Jane and I were together, we kept it a secret from everyone. But once we broke up and the band got to LA, that’s when the breakup really hit me full force and I couldn’t keep it all inside.

One night in our hotel room after a few too many drinks, I spilled everything to Reid. I knew I could trust him to keep a secret. He’s always been a locked vault, and to this day, he’s never betrayed my trust. And despite the recent tension between him and Walker, they used to be thick as thieves as well.

“You don’t get it.”

“Then explain it to me.”

How am I supposed to explain to him when I don’t even fully understand it myself?

“I want her back,” I whisper.

Reid settles on his side.

“But she doesn’t trust me. I can feel it. And how am I supposed to get past that?”

“You broke her trust. That’s not just going to be fixed overnight.”

“I know that.”

“And I doubt you agreeing to the fake relationship with Kerra is going to do you any favors in that department.”

“Are you trying to make me feel worse?”

Reid shrugs.

“Fuck you.”

“Not today.”

This fucker.“Seriously though. Tell me what you think I should do.”

“I don’t know, have you tried apologizing and telling her how you feel?” Reid chirps.

I grit my teeth, annoyed.

More so because he’s right.

“You haven’t?” he asks, eyes growing wide. “What the actual fuck, man?”

“I told you, I don’t want to scare her off when we’ve gotten to a good place.”

“But is that ‘good place’ the only place you ever want to be with her? Can you live with that?”

Fuck no. The idea of only ever being friends, seeing her find someone else, moving on and building a life that doesn’t include me, I can’t fathom it.

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