Page 109 of His Two Hidden Masks

“I know. I know.”

Mama shook her head back and forth. “I never meant for it to be like this. I never meant for it to happen.”

“For what to happen? For Sara to kill herself?” I said, the words escaping me without thinking. My breath shook, my face burned and I trembled as anger buried deep inside me bubbled to the surface.

Mama looked at me stunned, her mouth gaping as if gasping for air. Her expression pained me. I had gone too far. We needed to talk, but I had a more immediate issue to deal with.

Leo and I needed to get to Doge's Palace. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. Please, let’s talk later, Mama.”

“You have to understand what happened. I didn’t know. She heard us, and I didn’t know. I wouldn’t -- ” My mother’s voice caught with tears and she bit down on her knuckles, slowly sinking to the ground.

“Mama, you have to get up.”

Leo raised his eyebrows and shook his head. “Maria,” he said, softly. “You should sit. Let’s get her downstairs, Bella, and we’ll head out after. We have time.”

“Don’t go,” she whispered, rising, her eyes darting between me and Leo. My mother, the tiny general, looked fragile and so very small. “Please.”

I nodded to Leo, and together, we walked Mama down the staircase, through the foyer, and into a comfortable, blue, wingback chair. She sat with her hands in her lap, her breathing slow, as if she were trying to lower her pulse.

“Sara had secrets from me,” Mama said. “I don’t want you to, also, Bella.”

Leo and I knelt in front of her. I reached out and held Mama’s hand. “I don’t want secrets, and I have been asking you for help. Mama, we can talk about Sara later, but you need to trust me that our family is under attack.”

She looked up at me, her breath calming, her brown eyes narrowed.

“This deal, this acquisition. We need to stop it.”

Leo looked at me and shook his head. I knew he thought I was sharing too much. I took a breath and asked for guidance, not from God, not from Sara, not from anyone but myself.

What did I need to do next? The answer surprised me. I told the truth.

“Leo and I are going to San Marco. I am going to marry Roberto tonight, Mama.”

“No,” Mama said. “I know you don’t love him. Why would you do this?”

“If I marry Roberto, together we can block the acquisition,” I said. “I marry him, and we end this tonight.”

“There has to be another way. I don’t want you to do this. You deserve a life with love.”

My anger flared, remembering the way my mother had shamed me after I left Roberto. “Now, when I can actually do something to help our family, you are telling me it’s a mistake not to marry for love. You told me once that love would come later,” I said. “You told me that it was a mistake to want more.”

“I lied,” my mother said, her voice breaking. “I married your father. He didn’t love me. I waited and waited for his feelings to change. They haven’t. We haven’t changed, Bella.”

I looked at my mother, my stomach a mixing bowl of empathy and pain. I had craved her approval for so long. Her love was elusive, like a beam of sunlight that constantly shifted, leaving me in the shade. Papa never loved her. Mama had stood alone in the dark for years, just like me.

“Mama,” I glanced at the front door. “We are out of options. I am out of options. I know why I’m doing this and trust me. I will be okay.” The tick-tick of the old Grandfather clock in the hall was a familiar comfort to me as a child. Now, it made me anxious.

I leaned down and kissed her on her cheek. “We will talk when I get back.”

“When you get back,” she said. “How can I help you? What can I do?” She sniffed and wiped her nose. A flush of color returned to her cheeks.

“Keep Papa busy. Keep James Street occupied. They need to stay here and assume that everything is on track. All anyone needs to know is that Leo and I are at the ball.”

“And you truly think this is the only way?”

“Unless I marry Roberto and we stop this deal tonight, our family will lose everything, and I will not watch us turn to dust. The past doesn’t matter anymore.”

“My child, the past has haunted me since your sister’s last breath.”