Page 49 of Make You Mine

The two of them break off into conversation, leaving me to retreat to my never-ending thoughts.

I'm beyond nervous about seeing Trent’s parents for the first time in four years. Trent told me I have nothing to worry about, but I want to ensure I give them the best version of me. And thanks to Trent, I'm slowly returning to my former self. I can see and feel the subtle changes daily. No longer stuck in the shell of a person I’ve retreated into.

But the main reason my brain is on over-drive is because of Lottie. I didn’t even tell her about Trent and me, and I feel like the biggest piece of shit for that. Even if I had a moment to speak with her, my main phone is definitely tapped by Junior, and my other phones are for emergency use only, not for chit-chatting with my bestie.

I know deep down I withheld this information from her for fear of what questions she might ask. Questions I’m not sure I have answers to. Trent understood my hesitation but agreed that my conversation with Lottie should be held face-to-face. She deserves to get the full version of what my life has been like and not just the CliffsNotes. I owe her that.

I know she would never judge me, but now I just need to find the right timing.

Unlocking the bathroom door, I can hardly contain my giggle. We’ve been here for less than twelve hours, and we haven’t been able to keep our hands off each other. To think what we must look like walking out of the bathroom together. I fix my skirt, and Trent finishes buttoning up his pants. Before I can walk back out into the party, Trent grabs my wrists and spins me around. Crushing his lips to mine once again, our tongues twirl with one another as I wrap my arms around his neck.

I pull away from our kiss, well aware of how long we’ve been missing from Lottie and Greyson’s engagement party. I laugh at the sight of my lipstick smeared all over Trent’s mouth. Quickly grabbing a few tissues, I help him clean off the mess I’ve made.

“We have to get back out there, or people are going to start wondering where we’ve snuck off to.” I swat away his hand as he reaches for me again.

“Good. They should know I had the best bathroom sex ever just now,” he teases, too loudly.

My eyes go wide as my palm covers his mouth. “Shhh! Someone can hear you.”

I feel his lips pull into what I know is a smug-as-fuck look.

“You’re the worst. Come on,” I say, opening the door and walking out without looking back at him. Smiling inwardly as I stroll away. These past few weeks since Junior’s been gone have been filled with stolen moments like this. Forbidden glances, late-night hotel visits, sneaking off for just a minute of privacy. Even meeting at the vet office when Nori ate something he wasn’t supposed to. It doesn’t matter what we're doing, it's the time together I treasure the most. But being here is different, as if Nori Beach is our own little haven where we don’t have to hide. We can walk hand in hand and not have to worry about the repercussions.

By the time we return to the massive backyard tent, the party is well underway. The tent walls are tied back, allowing for the perfect view of the ocean right in front of their property. You couldn’t have asked for a more perfect November day in Nori Beach. The sun shines brightly, helping break through the breeze from the beach.

I’m so at ease when I'm here, always have been. Before this property was Lottie and Greyson’s, it belonged to her evil grandmother. We would come to visit every summer when we were teens, wasting our days away lying on the beach, soaking in the rays. Some of my favorite memories were made in this town, not to mention where I reconnected with Trent for the first time.

My eyes spot some movement along the tall sea grass lining the edge of their property. I squint to try to make out what could be causing such a disruption in the flowy grasses, but I don’t see anything. It’s probably my paranoia getting the best of me. I'm not used to letting my guard down in social situations anymore. It’s taking quite a bit of getting used to.

Trent laces his fingers with mine, breaking my stare. I shake off the feeling and replace it with a smile as we head over to our friends. Our friends, who have been more than understanding when Trent and I showed up like the past three years never happened. I'm thankful for their ‘mind your business’ upbringing. Makes me feel at ease.

I spot Micah and Luca already mingling with Greyson and the rest of the guys, and Lottie dancing with Emerson and Nox’s son, Kiran, in the middle of the dance floor. Everyone’s laughing and having a great time. Pure joy fills the air, and its contagiousness releases me from any trepidation. Today is going to be a great day.

Dessert is almost finished when I stand up, clinking my fork against my glass. My eyes roam over all the attending guests while I wait for them to quiet down. They linger on the familiar faces scattered throughout the tented space. Eventually, my gaze settles on the couple of the hour sitting right across from me.

“Hi, everyone. Thank you all for coming to celebrate two of the best people I know. For those of you who don’t know me, I'm Ashley.” My hand gestures to a glowing Lottie. “This gorgeous woman’s best friend since we were kids. Looking around at all your faces, people traveling from near and far, one would think with this big of a turnout, we were getting something for free.” I pause briefly for the chuckles among the crowd. “But we are, folks; we are getting something for free… A true depiction of what it means to find your soulmate. For no matter how many lifetimes it would take, these two were meant to find one another. Their love, although a little much at times…” I pinch my fingers together for emphasis and pause for the guest’s laughs. “Their love is pure, true, and constant. Like the waves crashing on the shore day in and day out, it’s there. Some days stronger and louder than others, but constant nevertheless.”

I pause as tears threaten to overtake my emotions. Trent grabs my hand to ground me with his presence. Releasing a long breath, I continue. “I was there from the beginning, the meet-cute in what some would call their romance book of a love story. Stumbling across a vixen of a Playboy Bunny and a Batman who only had eyes for her. Yes, folks, that’s right, they met dressed up in Halloween costumes, and no, not on Halloween; it was in the middle of June in the sweltering heat of a North Carolina summer. Whose idea was that, anyway?” I look at Greyson incredulously, who then points his accusatory finger at Trent. “Figures,” I jest, then continue.

“Needless to say, their love was something fierce. When these two reconnected months after the end of that summer, I knew deep down it was that forever kind of love.” Although I do recall asking Lottie if she needed me to hide any bodies for her during that separation, but that’s a story for a different audience.

“Now, here we are, four years later, celebrating their eternity. Because that’s what their type of love is. It's everlasting, one that will find them in every lifetime hereafter. So please raise your glass and cheers to the happy couple, Lottie and Greyson. May you always wake up with your best friend by your side and love in your heart. Love you both to pieces, and G, thanks for taking her off my hands.” I wink at him, and we all laugh while clinking glasses.

Trent stands beside me, pulling me close and kissing my temple. “You never cease to amaze me, babe,” he whispers, and I smile because, deep down, I was thinking of him…of us, while speaking those words. No matter what, we were meant to find each other, time and time again.

“I love you,” I say, leaning against his shoulder as he holds me tightly.

“I love you to the moon and back,” he whispers into my hair before placing a kiss on my temple.

Long after the guests have left, I find myself sitting on a lounge chair, which I dragged under the heated tent in Lottie and Greyson’s massive beachfront backyard. The guys are off somewhere catching up, and I slid out the back door once the kitchen was cleaned up and the girls were all distracted. I light the joint Ford had gifted me earlier in honor of our bestfriends getting married, taking a long inhale and letting the smoke drift upwards.

I didn’t think I would be so in my feelings today, but I found myself choking up on multiple occasions. Part of me wants to believe it’s because I'm overjoyed with happiness for my bestie. That she finally found her person, the man who will worship her till the day they leave this earth and even beyond. The other part of me is envious of her.

I know today has no room for jealousy, especially for the one person who has always been there for me through thick and thin. The Tig to my Bitty. But I am. I'm jealous that she gets to walk down that aisle and smile up at the man of her dreams. Sharing their vows of everlasting love and devotion with one another, surrounded by their closest friends and family. Where I, on the other hand, had to fight with everything I had not to break down in tears in front of a church filled with mostly strangers.

To imagine a life where I walk down an aisle, and the man I’m head over heels in love with is standing at the end with nothing but adoration in his eyes. The thoughts of what could have been bring tears to my eyes. It’s not that I haven’t felt these feelings before; it’s just now, with Trent back, that I am starting to realize how much of my own life I’ve been a bystander to, never fully immersed in what was actually going on.

I'm too distracted by my thoughts and the calming sounds of the ocean to notice Lottie has taken a seat beside me. “You okay out here?” she says, and I nod, then pass her the joint I’ve been sleeping on. All while trying my best to wipe away the tears before she notices.

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