Page 105 of Enchanting Her Monsters

“It’s okay, sweetie,” Jade says to him in a baby voice.

I lift her into my arms, and she squeaks at the unexpected action.

“I won’t have you fall down on my watch.” I carry her out of the bedroom and set her down on the long couch in the living area. I sit beside her and lift her legs into my lap and massage her feet. After a minute, I ask, “Better?”

She sits silently, staring at me with a strange look on her face.

“What? Something wrong?”

“No. It’s just weird having you here. Really here.” She quickly adds, “Not in a bad way.”

I’m irritated by that comment, and I’m not sure why. Though when I think about it, I realize she’s correct. Itisweird.

I pinch my lips together, feeling awkward for the first time in my entire existence.

“What is it?” she asks. “Did I upset you?”

“I… I don’t know how to bemeanymore.” I turn my face away, trying to hide my inadequacies.

“Hey?” Jade leans forward and with a gentle finger, she guides me to look at her. “You can talk to me. No judgment.”

“I’m a selfish asshole most of the time. I fed off Calder and others only when it served me. And now…” I choke up and stop talking.

“What’s different now?” she prompts in a soft voice.

“I don’t want to be just a magical sex leech.” I rub my eyes and feel the sting of tears. What the fuck? I don’t cry. Shit. Thismust be the influence from dying and being trapped in someone who’s actually in touch with their emotions.

When I don’t go on, Jade says, “From what I’ve seen, you weren’t‘just’anything. Your pack meant more to you than a meal ticket. And they loved you too. You were a complex person with a full range of traits, both good and bad. Just like everyone else.”

I sigh long and hard. “Jade, you don’t realize that I’m the monster other monsters fear. I can destroy a person, get past any locks, and dive into any mind and bend them to my will. I have consumed people whole, leaving them an empty husk. I can rip the dirtiest secret from someone’s thoughts or drive them to madness. I amthemonster. And I’d understand if you broke the bond building between us now that I’m explaining this all to you.” I look into her eyes, trying to implore her to grasp the truth in my words. “At my core… I’m just a monster who uses people for sex and magic.”

“Are you though?” She frowns like she knows something I don’t. “Tell me this, are your powers working?”

“Yes,” I answer warily.

“Then why haven’t you fed off me yet? Or Calder?” she asks. “If you were a mindless sex-machine monster, then you would have pressured me into sexual feeding or you could haveforcedus, as you say, but you haven’t done that.”

“Yeah, but…”

“No more buts. I need to hear whatyouwant to be in this new life of yours. And don’t tell me what youthinkI want to hear.” She sits back and waits for me to answer.

I take a long moment to consider truly what I hope for. “I’d like to finally participate in life. During my death, I got a taste of how removed I really was. I had time to reflect on how I always pushed my pack away. But now, I want to be a proper mate to you and Calder. Sure, I was loyal to the pack, but I didn’t participate. Engage. I mean… did I really know Flint at all? Notreally. I want to truly know them. Be there for them.” I shake my head, feeling like the asshole I am. “I’d like to be someone you come to for comfort and love. And I’d like it in return.”

“And sex?”

“I mean, I’m not going to turn down sex with you and Calder,” I confess. “But I don’t want that to be the only connection between us.”

“It isn’t,” she says, like it’s a fact. Perhaps she’s right. “We are connected through a freaking crazy bond of our souls and our experiences. We have spent hours in the shadowscape just talking.”

I pull her into my lap and kiss her like she is my very soul that I need to merge with. Not for a feeding but because she’s my mate.

“It’s okay to ask for what you need in a relationship,” she says, soothing me with soft strokes of her fingers over my brow and jaw. “Are you hungry?”

I growl with need. “Yes.” My mouth crashes over hers, and I murmur as I claim her, pulling her to me. “I’m hungry for your body, but I also hunger for your love. I want to devour you so I can keep you safe inside me. I want to give you the worlds and share all the beauty in them with you.” My lips brush over hers. “I love you, Jade.”

“I love you too.”

I pull her underneath me on the couch and cage her in with my body. I could use my shadows to pin her down, but I want her hands on me. Having her as a partner is a revelation. Only Maxum could thwart my paralytic power with his demon energy, not that we were physical very often. And now, Jade can give me that blessing and, by extension, give me Calder in a new way.

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