Page 25 of The Circus

“How would she feel if she knew that, Theodore?”

Not the full name, but still bad enough. I smirk, knowing precisely what Eden would say, and also knowing the exact shade of red her cheeks would turn. “She’d threaten to murder me, but she’d secretly like it.”

The corners or her mouth quirk upward, but she fights it, nodding sagely.

“What makes you think anyone would like to be stalked?”

I can’t keep the biting grin from my lips. When it unfolds, my mother doesn’t react like anyone else. She’s completely unfazed by it. Others—even Cash—have fear deep in their eyes when I smile like this, when the voices are whispering detestable things in my ear. But she knows me better than anyone ever will, and I don’t scare her in the slightest.

“It’s Eden. You’ll understand when you meet her.”

“And what will her family think of you?”

My grin broadens.

“Her dad will love me, obviously. But…uh…well, he’s sick,” I say, frowning at the end. Her eyes soften.

“Sick?”

“Terminal cancer.”

The early morning light filtering in through the kitchen window above the sink is bright and orange, painting my mom’s face the shade of a tangerine, and bathing everything else in a warm glow. Robins chirp. The rumble of the garbage truck down the road grows closer. Everything is still in this moment, and for some reason, I feel the need to commit it to memory, my mom’s hand trembling on her mug as her eyes glass over.

“She’s lucky to have you then, sweetheart.”

And it’s then that I know in my soul, I’m going to lose my mom, too.

I just pray I can give her the freedom she deserves before then.

SIXTEEN

TEDDY

“So…Ineed to borrow your car. Today. Preferably the beginning of lunch.”

Cash raises an eyebrow, leaning his shoulders against the locker next to mine. Per usual, I’ve already spotted Eden, and can relax slightly now that I know she’s safe.

“Where are we going?”

I grimace at him, trying and failing to appease his growing glare. “Weare not going anywhere.Iam going somewhere…I just don’t technically know where it is, yet.”

We turn, walking down the hall again, same as yesterday. Today is already off to a much better start. Miss Goss’ car was missing from the lot this morning. She’s either taking me at my word and is terrified, or she’s ruminating on all the ways she’ll try and fail to ruin my life while the bruises on her neck heal. Either way, I’m decided and set in my decision, and the voices chitter excitedly in the background of my brain; a constant noise but one I don’t think I could live without at this point.

“Is this a Teddy thing, or an Eden thing?” he asks, annoyance hindering his tone near the end. I glare at the side of his face but remain truthful.

“It has to do with Eden, yes.”

His head whips in my direction, and though he’s still glaring, his eyes are melting. At a glacial speed, but melting all the same.

“So you’re taking her to prom…she works at this shithole adult club with you…her dad is dying…what haven’t you been telling me?” he growls, knowing there’s more. There’s always more to the story with me, and he’s learned that. I don’t want to embarrass Eden by telling Cash, but who is he going to tell?

We pause, about to separate for the morning, and I sigh. “Look, she asked me to do something…private, with her, and my stipulation was that she go to prom with me first. Don’t pry, asshole. I think this has to do with those two fucks.”

He’s frowning at me, but I can see it in his eyes, the hurt he feels for her. Cash has always been empathetic, something I fail at. He grins suddenly, elbowing me.

“Not one to pass up the chance, huh?”

My lips press together, and he sobers. “She’s…mine, now. So if she has to deal with me and my…impulses…then I’ll be damned if I don’t treat her like a queen.”