Page 1 of The Circus

ONE

TEDDY POE

Seattle, Washington

Thirteen Years Ago (Teddy is Eighteen)

Neon redand blue lights swirl around the dusky street of an upper class neighborhood, blending into hues of purple when I allow my gaze to slip out of focus. My heart pounds in my chest so hard it shakes my frame, my tongue so dry it may as well shrivel up and turn to ash in my mouth. It would taste far better than the bitter hatred coursing through me.Go have fun, my mother had told me.Go be a teenager for once.

She underestimated just how vile teenagers are these days.

Cash stands beside me, lips pursed, hands clasped behind his back. I’ve already smacked the back of his head for his errant jokes at our expense, especially on the drive home in the cruiser. He’s simmered down, reminded that for me, trouble with the law would be a one way ticket to death row. Only three people alive know my story in all its macabre abhorrence; my mother, Cash, and my step father Dick.

And only one of those fuckers is using it to blackmail my mother and I.

Eyes zeroing in on that dirty kiddie toucher, I can’t help the sneer that paints my lips. Bloodlust is potent on my tongue, bringing it back to life. I salivate at the merethoughtof plunging my knife into his throat, but he controls too much, and so I’m stuck in literal hell with my mom, and there’s no end in sight.

We graduate in less than a month, and she keeps telling me to get out, go to college. But leaving her behind? Withhim? Fuck no. I’d rather perish alongside her, attempting to get away, than skip out and live my life, abandoning the woman who gave it to me.

Dressed in a matching pajama set, Dick stands on the steps to his upper-middle class home, a brick façade with ivy vines clinging to the mortar and window sills, gently waving in the breeze. He’s speaking to two officers—the two dipshits who just arrested me and Cash at a party. A party we never would’ve gone to, if not for my mother’s insistence. Through the darkness of midnight, my mom stands dutifully next to her paunchy husband, arms crossed, chewing her lip as she listens to whatever poisonous lies Dick is feeding the officers.

He’ll do anything to get me off the hook, because it simply means he will sink those very hooks right back into me. I have to admire his cunning brilliance, no matter how much I loathe it. If blackmailing were a paid and reputable profession, Dick would be the CEO.

“Shit,” Cash murmurs as my mother pulls away from the small gathering, eyes on the paved pathway as she makes her way over to us. I’m not afraid, not of her, because I know she will listen to our story and believe it. Unlike officers Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb.

She pauses in front of us, her shiny black hair pulled back, streaks of silver woven into the strands. When she glances up,the teal hue of her eyes can be seen even in darkness, and I have to thank whatever god runs this universe on a daily basis that I look nothing like my abusive pig of a father. Killing him was pure bliss. I wish every night that I could do it again.

She clears her throat, and Cash folds before she even speaks, hating to disappoint anyone, but especially her.

“We’re sorry, Mrs. Poe, seriously, it’s not what it?—”

She smiles softly, dimples forming near the corners of her lips, her eyes crinkling. Reaching out, she grasps Cash’s arm, only trembling a little this time. I’ve been keeping my eye on those muscle spasms she claims she’s having, demanding more than once that she go to a physician to figure out why.

“Cash, honey, I know you’re teens and that experimenting with drugs is…just part of…growing up, butcocaine?”

His eyes widen comically as he begins to wag his hands and spit out an explanation, but I snort, crossing my arms and grinning at my mom. She tosses me a wink and pats Cash’s shoulder.

“She’s not serious, dipshit,” I say, and he visibly relaxes.

“Thank fuck, because—you’re right, Mrs. Poe—we do experiment with drugs but never that—ooof,” he groans when I deck him in the shoulder.

“Can you be a little more discreet?” I hiss, eyeing the police, Dick’s hands motioning around as he continues to lay on the bribes.

“I feel responsible,” my mom says, chewing her lip again, a nervous habit she tries and fails to hide. “I told you two to go have fun.”

“It was fun. Until Brant planted his coke on us and called the cops,” I say flatly. He’s next on my shit-list. With less than a month until graduation, my mom had all but forced Cash and me to go to our first high school party. Being the local freaks ofSeattle Prep, we never get invited to anything, so we technically crashed it, hence why Brant played his funny little joke on us.

I hope he shits himself on Monday when we both show up to homeroom like nothing happened.

That alone may just make whatever punishment Dick is conjuring up for me worth it.

My mom’s eyes widen briefly before they narrow. “Now I feel bad for making you two go.”

“Nah, Mrs. P. ‘Twas fun while it lasted,” Cash says nonchalantly, slinging his arm over my shoulders. I swipe him away, top lip curling in annoyance. Cash is the little brother I never had, and the confidante I needed. Being sent to Seattle Prep and meeting Cash is the only good thing that’s come out of the marriage between my mom and Richard. That, and the Mustang his dad gifted him for his sixteenth birthday.

It’s been used in far more heinous crimes than I’m sure he ever envisioned for his son. Cash is simply a reliable and quick getaway driver, and he typically doesn’t pester me for details after a murder.

“You should go on home, hon. It’s late. Richard will…take care of this, I’m sure.”

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