Page 42 of Christmas with the Baby Daddy

Zach had always been there in the background. As my first crush, then my only one-night stand.

But we’d somehow found our way back together again. That same chemistry had been just as undeniably strong. We’d collided like a force of nature couldn’t keep us apart, like my nerves and reservations couldn’t convince me to stay away.

But he will stay away.I’d jump on him with the perspective that I should live in the present, in the moment, but that hadn’t erased my memory of his saying he’d be leaving soon again.

Later, after dinner, Sara drove me and George downtown since the repairs Jenny had arranged for the van weren’t done. Once we arrived, he ran off with ten dollars to the supervised kids’ tent. They hosted an array of carnival-like games in there, themed with the holiday spirit, but I bet he’d spend most of his time in the craft area. Since there were high schoolers and other volunteers manning the tent, it was a way to have him supervised without my being there.

In other words, a rare chance for an adult conversation.

“How.” Sara playfully slapped her glove on my arm as we got our hot cocoas from a vendor booth. “Could.” Another teasing slap. “You?”

I sighed and hung my head, hiding the smile that came with the reminder of why certain parts of my body were so tender and sore. “How? Have you seen how sexy that man is?”

She gasped, mocking a scandalized tone. “You don’t even deny it!”

I shook my head. “What’s the point of denying it? You saw his clothes on the floor. You saw his truck parked there.”

“And you’re lucky George didn’t,” she replied, laughing. As soon as I pulled up and saw it, I made sure to angle my car so he wouldn’t see it and wonder.”

I winced as we carried our hot cocoas to a table near the kids’ tent.

“Blake…” she drawled in a scolding manner.

I dropped my face into my hands and groaned.

“Sleeping with your baby daddy is dangerous territory.”

I lifted my face. “You’re speaking from experience?”

She rolled her eyes. “No. How did he take it?”

“Take what?”

Her mouth hung open. “What? You didn’t tell him?”

Once again, with a louder groan, I dropped my face into my hands.

“Oh, man. Oh… Blake! What? You didn’t tell him that he’s a daddy?”

“No.” I sat upright and cringed. “I know. I’m bad. It’s so terribly wrong of me not to tell him, but… No. I didn’t.”

“Very wrong.” She furrowed her brow and sipped her hot drink.

“It’s tearing me up inside.”

“Well, why didn’t you? You can’t make an excuse that you couldn’t contact him. He was there with you at the party. And obviously, afterward.”

“Ithoughtabout telling him.”

“Ha!” She pointed at me, closing one eye. “You probably spent all night thinking of how to tell him without any intention to.”

“You make it sound like I’m some wicked liar.”

“No. We both know you’re not. And we both also are aware of how outrageously nervous you are about telling him this big secret.”

“I am.”

She set her beverage down and tilted her head so much that her baggy hat almost slid off her blonde curls. “But why? What are you so nervous about? Or scared of?”

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