Page 101 of Pride, Prejudice, & Pretense

"Be a good boy, Ricky. Behave for Aunt Philippa!"

Philippa smiled goodbye at Lizzy and carried Ricky from the room. He waved at her and his mother over his aunt’s shoulder as they went out the door.

Karen settled back, a load groan escaping her lips. "I’m trying to be brave for Ricky to keep from scaring him, but my abdomen and my thigh…Jesus, they hurt! Getting shot isn't all it's cracked up to be. I'm no Vin Diesel! Can't get shot and go on like it was a bloody mosquito bite."

Lizzy reached for her friend's hand and squeezed it. "I meant what I said, Karen. You saved me up there. I was coming to help you when Wickham attacked me."

"What happened?" Karen gave her a returning squeeze of the hand and then grimaced at the pain in her stomach.

"He…tried to make sure that the seduction mission ended…happily…ashewanted it to end. To make me, or Fanny?my cover?do as he planned." She told Karen the details, reeling them off like a list, keeping her emotions in check, her tone clinical.

Nevertheless, Karen shuddered. "Christ. What a fucking monster. So Darcy shot him?"

"Yes. At the last moment."

"He deserved it, and worse. So what's for you now? Back to D.C.?"

"Yes, but not to Langley. I resigned this morning. I'll have the usual exit ceremonies to suffer through, the career transition service stuff, but then I'll be done."

If Karen was surprised, she hid it. "What will you do?"

Lizzy shook her head. "I don't know. Before I joined the Company, I planned to be a teacher, a professor. Literature. That's been on my mind again. Books. I hadn’t thought about books in a long time, but they've been coming back to me lately. On my mind. Partly, it was because of my cover as Fanny, a librarian, and Darcy's as Ned, an editor at a New York publishing house. Bookish covers. But that wasn't all of it. Part of it was just me?Lizzy. Maybe I'll go to graduate school. What about you?"

Karen shrugged delicately. She seemed a bit more lucid than she’d been when Lizzy first entered. “Return to the office. Return to reading stale chatter. It's not that bad, and with the little guy counting on me, I've now seen enough of gunfights. But Iknownow, you know? I know I can do this job, the job they trained me for and then tacitly decided I couldn't do before they shelved me in Casper. And thatsatisfiesme. I can live on that for a long time! Knowing I helped Agent Bennet. Although I think I need to carry a smaller purse, maybe with pockets…something with better organization."

Lizzy laughed and Karen did, too, before she inhaled and braced her hands on her stomach. "Oh…oh! It hurts to laugh. Shit!" She leaned her head back on the bed and took a slow, careful breath. "When will you leave the hospital?"

"In a couple of days.” She shrugged. “Dr. Williams wants to run a few more tests, and we're still waiting on the results of some of the ones that were part of the…kit."

Karen's face was grim, worried. "Nothing so far, though?"

"No. Thankfully, no."

Karen closed her eyes. Lizzy squeezed her hand again and stood up carefully. She was tired again, too.

Fitzwilliam’s letter was in the pocket of her sweater. She wanted to read it again and then cry herself to sleep.The only thing I'm sure of is you.

That was how she felt about Fitzwilliam.It was like he was surrounded by light.

Sure of him.

Everything else was unsure.

Doubtful.

BOOK FIVE: Parlous Agency

Refusal to accept the human condition may take the violent form of rebellion, of repudiating what reason presents as an end to be respected, and embarking on a life “beyond good and evil.” Or it may take the abject form of treating the task of respecting every rational creature as such as an impossible one, which it is unfair of our nature to have imposed upon us. The result is a life of pettiness and resentment.

— Alan Donagan,A Theory of Morality

Chapter Twenty-Five: Sub Specie Durationis

October ended while Lizzy was still at Banner Wyoming Medical Center. Her stay had lasted a few days longer than she’d anticipated. Dr. Williams had been good about seeing her each day. Lizzy spent most of the time either sleeping or talking to Karen…and to Ricky and Philippa when they were there. She used the trip down the hallway to Karen's room as her primary physical therapy. Otherwise, she worried and fretted about Fitzwilliam.

Charlie stayed in Casper to watch over her, and the agents remained posted outside both hospital rooms. Karen made steady, remarkable progress. She was, indeed, a strong woman. The two women grew steadily closer, and talking with her was extremely helpful for Lizzy.

Once Lizzy was up and about, Jane had begun to call, and they talked a couple of times a day. That, too, was a help. Since she needed to go to Langley to go through the necessary procedures to complete her resignation from the Agency, Lizzy was planning to stay with Jane in D.C.

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