Page 88 of Choices

"Stop it." I bark gently.

"We've done nothing but love those kids and given them what they deserve. You're going to have to keep us in check, though, because I'm pretty sure there's nothing we wouldn't give those kids. Don't want them getting spoiled..." I tease. She swats my chest lightly, so I feel a little better, knowing she's coming back around to playful.

She looks up at me through wet lashes. "I still can't thank you enough. For the gifts. For loving them." She fights against another sob.

"I can think of a way..." Matty teases, moving closer.

"I did pack the butt plug," she sasses back. And is rewarded with two vocal and one silent groan.

Chapter thirty-eight

Hannah

Christmas was more than I could ever imagine. Going from tense dinners with my parents and Christmas morning with a hungover and angry Alan, to five adults happy and loving on my kids...it does something to me I can't explain. I knew I loved the boys, but this...this is so much more. This is family. Messy, loud, crazy, but accepting of every flaw, every misstep.

I hate that Lauren never had her own babies, but the way she loves my kids like her own? Makes my heart grow four times larger. Diego slid into his role as the fun uncle almost immediately. And I can see all three of my kids relax visibly when they're with them. They revert to being kids.

And God, I wish we could live in this bubble forever. Me with my men. My kids with their chosen family. No stressors, no worries, no PTA, no worries. I know this isn't reality. But I'm soaking up every minute of it like an addict who can't get enough.

After a gorgeous Christmas dinner that Maria cooked - and that we insisted she join us for - the kids are exhausted. Viv was slow blinking the entire dinner as if she were going to pass out in her mashed potatoes at any moment.

They all sleep in the same room when they're here. A great room that used to be two rooms separated by a hallway, with a fireplace on either side, but the hallway was demolished so now it's just a large room, with thick stone walls, and two sealed off fireplaces. They callit the Blue Room. But it's large enough for twenty beds, so their three is nothing.

I lay a very sleepy Vivian down on her bed, intending to put her to bed first before tucking in the others. Matty and Santi watch from the door.

"Mommy?" Viv asks, sleepily.

"Yes, baby?"

"Are they our new daddies?"

I smile at the innocence in her voice. But think a minute before I answer. "You still have a biological father, but Santi, Rico and Matty are whatever you want them to be." I look up and see Jack and Aiden with the same questions in their eyes.

"I love them, and they're a part of our family now. But you're free to call them whatever you want." I smile at Matty and Santi. "A rose by any other name..."

"What does that mean, mommy?" Viv asks, rubbing her eyes with her fist.

"It means no matter what you call them, Rico, Santi, and Matty will always be here for us. They'll always be family. They'll always love and protect us. What you call them doesn't matter."

Vivian yawns hard and long before she nods and settles into her mattress.

I tuck in Jack and ask him if he has any questions about what I just said. He yawns, farts, and then says "nope", as if this conversation is as normal as telling him the weather.

Lastly, I move to Aiden. "And you, bud? What do you think about what Viv said?"

He sits up in his bed and his face reads so many things - maturity, immaturity, youth, heaviness. "I... I think I might try out names. Like...Rico and Matty feel more like a dad than our dad actually did. Maybe I'll try it out and see how it feels."

I pull him in tight to me. "You do whatever you feel like. I promise you; you won't hurt them if you decide the title 'dad' doesn't work for them. They love you regardless of what you call them. You try out names and figure out what feels right."

He nods, biting his bottom lip, before pulling me in for a tight hug.

"Whatever I call them, I'm glad they're a part of our lives. They've only brought good things into our life."

If only I knew then how wrong he was.

Chapter thirty-nine

Rico

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