Page 66 of Cruel Dreams

“That poor girl.”

“She’s going to live with an aunt in New Jersey. Her mother claims she didn’t know, but her daughter said she tried to tell her many times. Angelica Huxley may be looking at some prison time, too, at the very least, for neglect.”

My throat closes with heartache. I know what it’s like to beg for help and have everyone turn away. “She wanted the lifestyle of being Mrs. Huxley, the wife of the mayor of King’s Crossing,” I say bitterly.

“I think so,” Mel agrees. She pauses and sips her coffee. “Zane’s on the list.”

That’s not a surprise. “Because of Nathalie.”

This time it’s true.

“Yeah. Ash didn’t charge him, but he’s listed as a client.”

“That’s Zane’s fault for trusting Ash. Will he go to prison?” I straighten in alarm. “Who will take care of Zarah?”

“Because of his role in all this, he won’t serve time. He can plead his sentence down and pay a fine.”

I’m relieved on Zarah’s behalf. She’s had such a tumultuous few months since Denton and I found her at Quiet Meadows. I’m worried how more changes would affect her.

“Has he called you?” Mel asks.

“No. He took Max’s death hard. He’s grieving and probably needs time alone.”

She worries her bottom lip between her teeth. “I’m flying back to California at the end of the week. Banks gave me the okay as long as he can get a hold of me if he has questions.”

I want to reach out and touch her, pat her arm or something, but between the cast and the coffee, it’s too much effort. “I’ll miss you. Thanks for everything you did for us. Even if I didn’t like you at first.” I laugh a little, remembering her ambushing me in my old apartment.

“You don’t have to thank me, Stella, and you can visit whenever you want. Hell, if you want a job, I need an office manager. You have a good head on your shoulders.”

“Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind. I’m going to need one, and California would be a nice change of scenery. I’ve never seen the ocean.”

She tucks a piece of hair behind her ear. “What about Zane? He said he’d take care of you.”

I jerk a shoulder, almost sloshing the coffee out of my mug. “The last thing he told me was to fuck off—”

“He didn’t mean that. He was in shock.”

“I know, but I’m going to remind him of every terrible thing that’s happened. I don’t need him to take care of me. I need a little help to find my footing, then I can take care of myself. I have been all my life.”

Mel squeezes my arm. “Zane will come through. Underneath it all, he loves you. If, for some reason, he thinks it won’t work between you...he’ll still give you everything you need.”

I force myself to smile. “Yeah, sure.”

It’s not as easy as Mel makes it sound. I still have panic attacks when the real world gets to be too much, but I’ve been able to hide them from Quinn. I started having nightmares atnight. I fear being trapped, but I’m scared of the wide-open spaces of freedom.

I told Zane I want a home, but I don’t know where to find one or how to build one, and I’m too scared to try. Anytime I’ve tried to find stability, it’s been ripped from me like a magician pulling a tablecloth out from underneath a vase. Only, I shatter.

Every time.

I stay on the rooftop and watch the sun set. The view should give me peace, but it doesn’t. It only symbolizes one more day gone, and another day coming when I’ll flail, unsure of what’s next.

I linger on the rooftop until the sun completely disappears, and the hotel across the river that Denton said belongs to Ash remains a black column in the dark.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Zane

Ihate spending so much time away from Stella. I know how scared and uncertain she must feel, and you’re probably thinking I’m a real son of a bitch for making her go through these empty days alone, but I have good reason, trust me on this.

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