Page 109 of Cruel Hearts

“Yeah, she is.”

“She loves you.”

“I hope she does, and I’m grateful for it.”

Nathalie picks at the bedspread. “I love you, too, you know. When you told me you were going keep me, I thought...I thought we were going to be together. But you’re just like the others. Using me to get what you want.”

Her confession doesn’t surprise me, but I wish she wouldn’t have said it. There’s nothing to be gained by it. I’m not in a position to love her back.

I never was.

“I’m sorry you think that. I would rather you think you’re helping us destroy a very powerful, evil man. Him releasing you to me only helpsyou. What about the other girls? Your friend, Mandi? The women who share your apartment building? I know you’re a better person than that. You’ll have what you need to start over, I promise. That should be enough.”

She narrows her eyes. “What if it’s not? What if I don’t help you unless you give me what I want?”

I draw in a breath. “I’m in love with Stella, and I’ll never give you what you want. Go ahead and walk, if you’re brave enough, but you know how dangerous Ash is. Do you want to gamble with him, or do you want to work with me? Ash was using you too, you know. What does he do to the women he no longer finds useful?”

She lifts her chin and says, “That wouldn’t be me.”

Slowly, I nod. “You can take that chance. Tell him you’d rather keep hooking than marry me. Maybe he’d believe you and you could keep fucking the mayor, but maybe he’d wonder why you’re turning down the chance to be a billionaire’s wife. Or don’t tell him anything and you can see how far you get on your own. Stella can tell you that it’s not very far.” I sigh. “Please, Nat. Don’t bet on this. I have the cash to play—you don’t.”

I caress her face, her eyes so like Stella’s. Nathalie brought me a huge amount of comfort, and I need to remember that.

My parents were dead, Stella had disappeared, and after Zarah broke down, I was completely alone.

Until Nathalie.

It’s because of Ash I needed her in the first place, but none of this is her fault.

“I’m sorry I can’t give you more,” I murmur.

“Me too.”

I leave Nathalie in her room staring at the bedspread clutched in her fist.

I’m sorry I can’t be the person she needs me to be. She’s lived for Ash for the past seven years. It will be a difficult journey, but eventually she’ll learn how to live for herself. I know what it’s like to feel alone. I know what it’s like to feel as if no one loves you. I haven’t learned to live for myself, either. One day I may need to heed my own advice.

Shuffling down the hallway, I go in search of the one person who can push those feelings away.

Stella and Quinn are sitting in Max’s suite, and I don’t interrupt them though I crave to be part of their circle of friendship. I’ll need to find a way to keep Quinn in Stella’s life. That was one of my problems before. I wanted Stella all to myself, and when I had her, I couldn’t see beyond our relationship. Moving her to my office, hanging out at her apartment.

We’ll be two halves of a whole, but in her half, she won’t be alone, and I’ll have to do my best so I’m not alone in mine. It’s the only way our relationship will survive.

As much as I hate it, I let Stella and Quinn catch up.

Mel’s still on her laptop, and Paulo occasionally points to something on the screen. Denton looks on in interest, but his gaze flits to Stella every now and then.

Max is sitting by Zarah’s side. He’s proven he’s solid, and I appreciate the investigating he’s done on the black box. I can only pray the transcript will have the answers we need to prove Clayton Black killed my parents.

When Stella’s death blows over in the news, I’ll call my contact at the FBI and schedule a meeting. It will be interestingto poke him with what I know. He’s held all the cards before, but I do now.

I like that feeling much more.

Our family doctor hasn’t called after examining Zarah at the penthouse the morning I brought her home. I want to update him on how Zarah’s doing, but I also have a few questions. I step into the hallway. Zarah doesn’t need to hear me talking about her. I connect to his personal cell number and the line rings only twice before he answers.

“Dr. Reagan, it’s Zane.”

“Zane, is Zarah all right?”