Page 58 of Terragnata and the Heir of the Earth

He said nothing.

Anger bubbled in my voice. “Answer me, Ezren. Did she plant fake memories in my mind? Tell me the truth.”

He looked at me again, his expression alight with the same hunger that woke me up mere days before. “You want the truth? Here it is. Imurderedmy wife. I’ve had to live with that guilt every day of my gods damned existence since. I could barely remember what it felt like tohope, let alone care for another. I’ve lived in a shadow—half asleep—wandering alone from one place to the next as a low-level warrior for coin.

“Until I met you. Half wild and covered in days of filth… brimming with fight and fire. You were soalive, and it was intoxicating—the first time I’d felt anything in a long time. In one hundred and fifty years, I havenevermet anyone like you. I didn’t think anyone like you even existed. I knew you were betrothed, and it killed me not to say anything. So I tried to stay away, I really did. But then you made mebreatheyour wanting scent and…” he trailed off, a part of him twitching in my periphery.

I didn’t move a muscle. I didn’t dare glance away from his face.

“Believe me, I regret my actions. I should have never laid with you, not until you knew everything. And if I’d known the binding would happen… I would have let those Crona walk right into the human realm. But here we are, bound. And while they may try to undo it, so long as there is breath in my lungs, I will be bound to you, whether you like it or not.”

My stomach twisted, like I’d just been punched.He regrets lyingwithme, but not lyingtome?And all those words… Though not exactly a declaration of love, he’d spoken things I’d craved to hear deeply.

My wounds went deeper.

“I will never be bound to someone who deceives me, who lies to me. I’ve been lied to too many times in my life,” I spat, barely able to get the words out without feeling physical pain in mychest. “After losing my family, I was so vulnerable. I let myselftrustyou. All of you. I won’t make the same mistake again.”

I made my way back to the cell door, swung it open, and stepped to the side to ensure some distance remained between us when he left.

“But right now, our binding is the one thing keeping my mother and the king from shoving me down the aisle to marry Cas. So you need to leave, Ezren. Go far, far away, and don’t fucking come back,” I choked out the last part, unable to meet his gaze. I fought the moisture threatening to streak my face, and I feared a look at those burning emerald eyes would undo me.

I didn’t know if sending him away would prevent them from breaking the binding, but I knew he had to leave. Not only could I no longer trust Ezren, but I would never have a clear head to seek the truth—about my memories, my kidnappers, or how I felt about Cas—with him near.

Ezren stood before me, not too close, respecting my obvious request for space. I bit my lip to keep the tears at bay and raised my head, willing myself to look at him in the end.

His expression grew soft. “Terra, I’m sorry. I should have never let things go as far as they did. Just know that even though I may never be able to give you what you deserve, I will always be there for you. Break your left small toe, and I’ll know you want me to come. At any other injury, all of which I will feel, I promise not to interfere.”

And he walked past me, turning once more from the end of the hall. “Should you choose to one day marry Cas, or should you not, I think you’ll make an inspirational and revolutionary queen, whatever region is your domain.”

And then he was gone, and my heart broke, which shocked me, for I had thought it was already broken.

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

TATTOO LESSONS

Ilet myself cry for a long while, huddled in a ball on the floor, arms wrapped around my sides, not caring if the guard woke and found me. Eventually, I realized it had been quite some time and that the sun would rise soon. I made my way up the stairs and eased the dungeon door shut. When I went to the alcove to check on the guard, he still slept, naked and bound with small remnants of his clothing. Ezren would have needed something to wear out of the palace.

My eyes had swollen, and my head pounded. While I wished to go back to my room to sleep, I also wished for some semblance of comfort. I considered returning to Gia, but that would raise questions with the guards.

So I sought out Cas. Not for intimacy, but he was still a friend, and I knew he would hold me if I asked him. I returned to the wing where my quarters were and walked in the direction he had left my room the day before. It was a gamble, but I suspected they housed me in the East Wing—that of the crown. If my memory of the palace layout didn’t fail me, he should be nearby.

I passed several doors, but they were unguarded, so I assumed they weren’t his. Finally, I came upon two massivewooden doors that would open away from each other, a pair of burly guards flanking them.

“Is this Cas’s room?” I asked from beneath lowered lashes, attempting to defer suspicion by looking like his to-be bride shyly paying him an early morning visit.

One of them cleared his throat. “Ehm, yes, miss, but I don’t think he wishes to be disturbed?—”

I cut him off by swinging one of the doors open.

And there stood Cas, naked by the moonlit window, smoking some sort of pipe. His hair hung unbound and wild, and I could now see the full extent of the swirling lines of tattoos that snaked up his body. Thorned vines tangled with fir sprigs and aspen leaves, running from his outer knee, up the side of his buttock, up his lean abdomen, and then culminating in a cluster of buds and branches on his pectorals. And even from my vantage point, I could see the word formed by small letters floating amongst the flora and fauna that decorated his chest.

“T E R R A,” it read.

I gaped at him, and he returned with a casual incline of his head, as if he expected me to be there, unashamed of his bareness. “Do you like it? I got it the day I turned fifteen. It had been over a year, and I’d finally accepted you weren’t coming back. I got it to keep your memory alive, to never forget you, and to remind myself to never love again, to prevent another experience of such… loss. We were so young, never married, and yet I felt I knew the pain of my father when he lost my mother. Such dramatics, are we not, when we’re young?” He chuckled to himself. I stood there, gaping a moment before I realized I had not sensed the other presences in the room.

My eyes shot to the chaise by the fire first, which had a white-haired Fae female draped over it, very passed out, very naked, and very covered in welts that ran the full length of her lean backside. And then I looked to the bed, and blinked severaltimes, for I almost did not believe it was Fayzien that I saw there, a sheet partially hiding his manhood, his breathing soft and relaxed.

I looked back at Cas, my eyes wide with confusion, shock, and anger. He smiled at me once more, this time with sadness. “I told you,mi karus, I am no longer a little dove.” And with that, he guided me to the door and sent me through with a gentle push, shutting it with finality.

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