I kept my eyes on the Witch, fighting to maintain a neutral composure.“I’m ready.”
Jana took my hand in hers, and a familiar sensation of heat crawled over me. I yanked it back as if stung, and she blinked at me.
“S-sorry, let’s try again.” My breath turned shallow.
She lifted my fingers gently. The warmth began again, even more tepid and tender. I bit down on my lip, swallowing the rising panic as that sensation traveled elsewhere, ignoring the sudden feeling that I was no longer clothed and standing in front of a strange male.
Don’t move, don’t move, don’t?—
I yanked my hand back again, a strangled sound escaping my open mouth.
“I don’t know if I can,” I whispered, heat stinging my cheeks, a solitary, traitorous drop of water springing from my eye. “I don’t know why it feels… so… unbearable.”
“Because last time, this was not of your choice.” Jana’s words were not a question.
I swallowed, nodding.
“Let’s take it at your pace.” Jana gestured for my hand once more, and I gave it. “Just feel my touch for as long as you need. We are in no rush.”
So we sat like that—for minutes, or longer—until my breath returned to its usual rhythm. “Let’s try again.” I forced a smile.
The Witch’s brows raised. “Are you sure? We can take it slow.”
“I want to learn control.” This wasmypower. I would not let Fayzien or the memory of him take any part of it.
Jana smiled back. “Alright, now, try to send a hint of your power into me first, and once I feel it, I will return a slip of my own.”
I did as she instructed, the act more intuitive than I expected. It was as if she waited for me—waited to embrace my magic in a friendly hug that returned her own. And when she did, discomfort still nagged, especially for the heartbeat it traveled through me. But after a few moments, our link completed, and the sensation faded.
“Doing okay?” Jana probed.
“Yes, I can feel it—our connection. It’s not so bad now… just slightly foreign.”
“Good. Now, let’s try to activate your magic. This time, I don’t want you to simply grab that tendril of power you saw before. I want you to perform a specific action of controlusing it. Imagine the soil between us. Life flows within it. Feel that life force. Make it yours. Accelerate the growth within it.”
I am okay. I am safe. I will not lose control, not again.
I held her fingers in mine and looked down. A patch of dirt revealed itself. I closed my eyes once again, sensing the vibration of the Earth.
“Easy now, Terra. I’ve got you. Try to start with a single bloom—nothing more. Andrelax.Think of something that makes you feel calm to start.”
My pulse hummed and I released one hand into the soil, the image of Leiya, Sanah, and I splashing in the pond painted faintly to the back of my eyes. The Earth was an extension, calling out, a soul yearning for mine in a way that was undeniable. I flowed a slip of my power to it, beckoning it to rise and give life. It bent to my will, or I bent to it, and a single sprout grew. I gaped at the sudden bloom, at the thrill of it—and adrenaline flooded my veins.
The sprout exploded, growing in thickness and height in almost an instant. It traveled up, up, upwards, reaching toward the sky.
And then the growth stopped, and my power was yanked back as if held by a leash.
“Tranquilla, Terra. I know you are excited—the release of power can feel… overwhelming. Thrilling. But youmustrelax and remain calm if you want your commands to be obeyed. If you don’t want to lose control.”
Jana breathed a cantrip, and the giant stock dissipated, a green mist blowing gently away from us. She narrowed her eyes at me. “Again.”
I nodded, exhaling to calm my stammering heart. But the image of flying debris and Dane’s unconscious body stuck in my head.
Jana handed me a palm full of dirt. “Visualize what you want—a single bloom from only here.”
I blew out a slow breath, concentrating on the Earth in my palm. I fed another tendril of power into the dirt, focusing on controlling it. But instead of the Earth blooming into a small growth, it flew off my hand with speed, exploding into a visual cacophony of flower buds, blinding us for a moment.
I uttered an obscenity. “I can’t do this.”