Page 7 of Cooper

“We also train to get driver’s licenses, and yet we sometimes die in car accidents. Pilots spend years learning to fly, and sometimes planes crash. Sometimes shit just happens. It sucks ass but death is part of life. Logan knew what he was getting into when he took this job, and he had zero regrets.”

“How do you know?” I ask, swiping at unexpected tears.

“Because he didn’t die right away. Because he talked to Sandor in the car on the way to the hospital. He had instructions for his mom, what he wanted done with his things… And he thanked Sandor for being his friend and giving him the opportunity to be a Royal Protector.”

“And no message for me.” That hurts a little.

“I’m sorry, no.” He looks apologetic. “He was more focused on telling him it had been his honor to live—and die—for this family.”

“Well, that’s bullshit!” I cry, slamming my hand down on the table. “It wasn’t even his country.”

And then I burst into tears.

* * *

It’s been a long day.Between getting dizzy at the gym, my breakdown in front of Joe, going to the doctor for a physical, and then meeting with Dr. Saluga in the early evening, I’m drained. Not that it will help me sleep, but at least I’ll rest. I hope so anyway.

And for the first time in days, I think of Cooper.

We emailed and texted constantly the first couple of weeks I was back, and then he was supposed to be leaving for the U.S. And that was it. Which is weird. I spent almost six months with the man. We were together every single day, and even though we only hooked up a few hours before I left Iraq, I know Cooper about as well as I know anyone. There’s a reason we’re drawn to each other, and even though our lives are taking us in different directions, I thought we would remain friends, if nothing else.

For him to simply ghost me makes no sense.

It hurts so I make a conscious effort not to think about him. Or about that night in the storage locker. No one has ever taken me that way or been so rough while simultaneously so excruciatingly sensual. It’s unbearable to think I’ll never have sex like that again. Or talk to him again.

It’s not that my heart is broken, but we’re supposed to be friends. From the day I arrived in Baghdad, we had a connection. He showed me the ropes, introduced me to people, and helped me acclimate to something so different than what I was used to. I honestly thought he would treat me better than this.

He should be back in the U.S. by now. Unless something happened. He only had a few weeks to go in the deployment when I left, and while it’s unlikely, what if something happened to him?

I grab my phone and open the texting app.

I got close to the guys in the unit I’d been assigned to. They were a little distant at first but warmed up to me and I to them. One of the guys was a retired marine who was now with the NSA. I’m not exactly sure what his position is or why he’d been temporarily embedded with a marine unit again, but I text with him regularly now that he’s back in Washington, D.C. and I’m home.

NATALIA: Hey. Have you heard from Cooper? I’m kind of worried. He usually texts me every day and he’s been quiet for over a week.

To my surprise, my phone rings, and I answer in confusion. Louie had never called me before.

“Hello? Lou?”

“Hey, Natalia.” His voice is somber.

“What’s going on?” I ask automatically, my heart starting to beat harder. For him to call, he has to have bad news.

“So, about Cooper.”

“Is he okay?” I whisper, sinking onto the bed as a feeling of dread spreads through me.

“You sitting down? Because it’s not good.”

No, no, no…

THREE

Cooper

Friday the thirteenthis always a shit day, and normally I stay in my office, keep my head down, and don’t come out until after midnight. Yesterday, of course, we had to go pick up a bigwig from the airfield a few klicks from base. And I needed to be there to greet him. All the fucking pomp and circumstance. I love the military most days, but every so often the uptight rules and regulations make me want to roll my eyes.

Things went wrong so damn fast.

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