Page 94 of On Wings of Blood

“It’s true,” I insisted. “You’re so...” I searched for the right word. There were many I might have used. Honorable. Kind. Naive. Idealistic. “Good,” I settled on. “You have a good heart.”

“You do, too,” she said immediately. “I’ve seen it. You’ve been kind to me. Kind to Naveen.”

“But I’m not kind. Not nice. Not really. I never have been. Even as a child. I’ve never viewed the world as a good place. I’ve never really believed that good would triumph over evil or that people are naturally good at heart.” And it was certainly even harder to believe in those things here in Sangratha. “I’m a pessimist, I guess,” I finished awkwardly. “I’m always inclined to think the worst of people, not the best.”

Florence was staring at me. I wanted to look away from those soft, gentle eyes but I didn’t.

“Medra,” she said. “Sometimes the problem is that we don’t see ourselves the way others do. Look at what you did tonight.”

I frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I mean look at the fluffin. You found him on the beach. You could have left him there to die. So why didn’t you? Because you hoped against hope that he would live. And why did youwant that? Because you have a kind heart. Because you’re a good person.”

I didn’t want to argue with her. I knew there was nothing good about me.

I tried to smile. “Maybe. Maybe there’s hope for me yet.”

“I know there is,” she said firmly. “You’re my friend, after all. And I have the best friends. You and Naveen.”

But when I went to sleep that night, my dreams weren’t filled with Florence or Naveen or the fluffin pup.

I saw only a man with piercing gray eyes standing in front of a blazing bonfire.

CHAPTER 19 - MEDRA

The next day, Vaughn wasn’t in Basic Combat with Naveen and I. I wondered about it, but then decided he’d probably had a much later night than I had. I wondered if he’d tried Theo’s ambrosia.

When Naveen and I came out of our last class, Florence was waiting in the hall. She looked frantic.

“What is it?” I asked in alarm.

“The pup,” she whispered. “His fever is higher. He’s worse, not better. And there’s nothing else I can think of to do.”

“Would your mother...?”

But Florence was already shaking her head. “This isn’t one of her areas of expertise. All she could do is point us towards more resources. But we don’t have time to sit around reading books.”

“So you’re saying the pup is going to die?” I said slowly.

She took a deep breath. “What I’m saying is we need to get it to a real healer. If we take it to the First Year infirmary, we’ll get into trouble.”

“There are house healers,” Naveen said, looking at me. “You already saw one.”

I understood what they were suggesting. “You want me to take the fluffin to the House Drakharrow healer.”

Florence shook her head. She looked miserable. “You can’t do that. You’re not allowed in the House Drakharrow tower withoutBlake. Not yet. You’d have to go to Blake first and ask him to do it.”

“Beg him, you mean? Ask him for a favor?” I clenched my jaw and felt like screaming. The fluffin pup was only in this mess in the first place because of the cruelty of a highblood girl. And now Florence and Naveen wanted me to go and ask another highblood for help.

We’d put the pup in Florence’s room last night. I thought of how small he’d looked curled up on his makeshift bed, just a little ball of red fur. Was he dreaming of his mother? His brothers and sisters? He’d probably never see any of them again.

“You don’t have to do it, Medra. I know you don’t want to be beholden to him,” Florence said softly.

She and Naveen were both watching me. We’d told Naveen what had happened this morning. He’d been shocked, and upset he hadn’t gone with us. I think he felt guilty about not being there to protect Florence. Not that he’d have been able to do anything.

I exhaled. “No, it’s all right. I’m being stupid. I’ll do it. I’ll go and talk to him.” I lifted the leather satchel that held my school books up onto my shoulder. “If I can find him, I mean. I don’t have another Advanced Weaponry class until the day after tomorrow.”

“Maybe we’ll run into him in the refectory,” Florence said. “But I can’t go and look. I have another class right now.”

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