I take a drink of the coffee and then spin my seat so I’m looking at her. “First of all, you’re cut out for anything you want to do. You’re the best at your job. You remain calm and do what needs done. And I know you don’t want to hear it, but I’ve thought about it all night. That woman wanted to be with her husband, and it was her time to go. Neither you nor the doctors could do anything to help her, but you know what? I bet after your talk with her, she felt at peace. She had someone tell her they cared about her. That made a difference to her, Chrissy.”
She creases her forehead. “So you don’t think I should change jobs?”
I brush the hair that has come out of her ponytail off her face and tuck it behind her ear. “I think you should wait a few days to make any decisions about your future. I know you love your job, but I also know you’re thinking about having a family and kids, and maybe a job where you’re not on call and working crazy hours would be a good move, but you should think about it, honey. Don’t do it because of what happened yesterday.”
She juts her chin at me. “I’ve been thinking about it for awhile.”
I chuckle. “Oh, I know you have. And I’m sure you have a pros and cons list, highlighted and color coded. You know that whatever you want to do, I support you one hundred percent. You need to do what makes you happy.”
That seems to satisfy her because her face softens, and she smiles at me. “Being a nurse makes me happy, but I feel like I need a change.”
I nod. “I get it. I understand.”
She keeps looking at me, and because I’m drawn to her, I’m practically inches from her face. I lean back, grab my empty plate, and go over to the sink. “You done?”
She grabs her piece of toast. “Yep.”
I take her plate and start to load the dishwasher.
“How come you haven’t been dating anyone?”
I heard the question, but I act like I didn’t. I never lie to Chrissy, and that’s a hard question to answer without telling her the truth. I mean, what am I supposed to say?Because I love you and I don’t want to date any woman but you? I can’t say that to her.
“Gabe, you ignoring me? How come you haven’t been dating anyone?”
“I date.”
She laughs as she comes around the island and stops next to me. “Right. Well, you haven’t dated anyone in three years.” She grabs the pan off the stove and stops next to me. “I mean, unless you’re dating and you just haven’t told me about it.”
I resist rolling my eyes. Hell, she knows everything about me. She probably knows me better than I know myself. “No, I haven’t been dating and not telling you.”
She puts the pan in the dishwasher, grabs our juice glasses, and hands me mine. “Want to finish that?”
I chug the orange juice and then put the glass in the dishwasher.
She’s wiping down the counter, and I’m hopeful that we’re done talking about my lack of dating, but I should have known that Chrissy wouldn’t just let it go. “So why aren’t you dating?”
I shrug. “You want the truth?”Or half the truth anyway, because I can’t tell her everything.
She nods her head, and I lean against the counter. “None of the women I’ve dated are okay with our relationship.”
She gasps and pokes her thumb against her chest. “Me? Our relationship?”
“Yes, our relationship.”
She puts a hand on her shapely hip. “But why? I don’t understand. Your girlfriends have a problem with me?”
I stand up and put my arms across my chest. “First of all, they weren’t my girlfriends. Second of all, I tell any woman that I’ve dated that you come first. Some of them say it’s okay, but as soon as they indicate they’re not okay with it—and their true colors always come out—well, I break it off.”
She’s still pointing at herself. “Because of me?”
I just look at her. How can she not have a clue how I feel about her?
She stomps her foot. “Well, that’s not right. I don’t want to stand in your way of finding…” She starts choking and then clears her throat. “A girlfriend. I want you to be happy, Gabe. I can’t believe you’ve never told me this before. Oh my God, this is all my fault.” She starts pacing the kitchen and stops. “Alison. You were dating Alison, and I called you when Otis died and you came and spent the weekend with me.”
“Honey, your dog died. Of course I was going to stay with you.”
She gasps and puts her hand over her mouth. “Oh my God, I was the reason you broke up with her?”