7
CHRISSY
“Thank you for hanging out with me.”
I’m walking Cat to the front door, and she squeezes my hand. “Of course, anytime.” When we get to the door, she pulls me in for a hug, and I do my best not to start crying again. When she pulls back, she searches my teary eyes. “I can stay until Gabe gets here.”
I shake my head and wipe at the wet streaks on my face. “No, it’s okay. I’m sure he’ll be here any minute.”
As soon as I get the words out, the doorbell rings, and I swear a calm comes over me. It’s always been like this. Gabe has always been the one that can bring me peace.
I open the door, and Gabe just stands at thethreshold and stares at me. He’s worried about me, that much is obvious. His forehead is creased, and the little lines by his eyes are heavier as he looks at me pensively. I put a hand to his chest, and he takes both of his and moves my hand over his heart and just holds it there. I can feel the steady thump, and for the first time today, I feel like I can finally catch my breath.
“Uh, okay well, it looks like you’re in good hands. I’m going to get out of here, but you call me if you need anything. Gabe, call if she needs us, okay?”
He nods and agrees but never takes his eyes off me.
I turn my head to look at Cat. “Thank you again.”
She just smiles at me. “Anytime, you know that.”
Cat leaves, and Gabe steps into the house, shutting and locking the door behind him. He brings one hand up to my cheek. “You could have called me earlier, ya know. I would have come.”
I sigh because I know I could have, and no matter what he was doing, he would have come running. “I know, but you had plans, and I didn’t want to—”
He cuts me off, shaking his head. “You call mefrom now on. I mean, if you need me or want me, you call me. It’s as simple as that. Don’t think about what I might be doing because no matter what it is, I would rather be with you.”
As I look into the depths of Gabe’s eyes, I can’t help the way I feel. Everything he says—everything he does—I wonder if it has a different meaning. This is the same way he’s always treated me, but it feels different now, and I wonder if it’s my feelings that are the reason I’m questioning everything.
I back away from him. “You’re going to ruin me for other men, Gabe.”
I turn away from him and take a shuddering breath, and I swear I hear him say, “Good.”
I stop and spin around so fast, I grab onto a chair to keep myself steady. “What was that?”
He rubs his hand across the stubble of his chin. “Nothing. You want some tea? Ice cream? What do you need?”
I shrug, feeling the weight of the day. “Nothing, really. I want to lay down and try to forget about today.”
He nods, and his jaw tightens. “Go ahead, get in bed.”
I don’t move because I don’t know how to tell him I don’t want to be alone, but I don’t have to saya thing. “Go ahead, honey. I’m not going anywhere. I’m going to get some waters, and I’ll be right there.”
My eyes widen. “You’re going to stay the night?”
He rolls his eyes. “You really think I’d leave you alone?”
“I hope not.”
He reaches for me, but before he touches me, he stops and pulls his hand back. “Go ahead. I’ll be right there.”
I walk down the hallway to the bathroom off my bedroom. I take care of business and brush my teeth, averting my eyes from the mirror. My eyes are still red-rimmed and my lips are swollen. When I finish, I walk into the bedroom, and Gabe is looking at the pictures on my bedroom wall. I stop next to him. “Did you see the new one?” I point at the picture of him from two months ago. “When you got promoted to captain and we all went to celebrate.”
I look at the picture I took, and it’s him with all our family. He nods, but he’s not smiling. “You’re not in it.” He turns his head to look at me. “Yeah, I have one with the two of us that night. Holden took one and sent it to me. I’ll send it to you.”
I nod. “I didn’t know he took one. That sounds great. Send it to me.”
I walk over to the bed and climb under the covers. We have slept in the bed together hundreds of times through the years, but for me, it feels different now. I look up at him and wonder if it’s different for him.