Page 55 of Command and Control: GHOST Operative

When Holden finally catches his breath, he shakes his head. "It’s about fucking time you got laid."

I press one hand to my forehead, squeezing my temples with my thumb and fingers. "We're not having this conversation."

"Why not? It's just sex." Kyler tries to brush this whole thing off into a category I'm not sure it fits in, and he must see it on my face, because his eyes widen. "Is it just sex?"

I should not be talking about this with them. But I'm not allowed to talk to anybody else, and they’re my sons. They don't need to know the nitty-gritty, but they deserveto know where I am and the basics of what's going on. "It's complicated."

Now it's Holden's turn to look surprised. "Oh shit. You're in a whole thing."

I look between their faces. "A whole thing?"

"A one-night stand isn’t a whole thing." Kyler's the one who decides to explain this to me. "Relationships are a whole thing."

Everything has been so crazy that I haven't really had time to think about what’s going on.

Okay, that's a lie. I try to think about what's going on, but I keep running into a wall. A large, grumpy, silver fox-shaped wall.

"I've sort of crossed paths with someone, and things are just a little up in the air." That sounds like a decent explanation.

"So does that mean he's from Nashville?" Holden’s head tips forward and his voice drops. "Please tell me you didn't meet him on Tinder."

"I didn't meet him on Tinder." I pause. "I met him through the Internet." I'm really managing to make this sound not too terrible, and I feel like I should pat myself on the back.

"So he's not from Nashville?" Holden’s words are slow. Like he's trying to pick apart the information I'm offering. That's a problem, because he is one hundred percent my son. He loves solving problems and digging into data. That's probably why he decided on a similar career path to the one I chose. "No. He's not from Nashville."

"So if you're at his place, then you're not in Nashville." Holden leans closer, expression serious. "Where are you?"

I have to tell them. I can't lie to my children about where I am. What if they need me? "I'm in Alaska. "

"Jesus Christ."

"Holy shit."

Both my sons react at the same time, and it makes me cringe, because there's no way for me to spin that to make it sound reasonable.

"How the fuck did you get to Alaska?" Holden rakes one hand through the waves of his dark hair. "How long have you been there?"

"I haven't been here long. I just got here..." I have to think, because it feels so much longer than it's actually been. "Early yesterday morning."

Both of my sons stare at me for a second, looking at me like I've lost my mind. Finally Kyler speaks up. "So you flew to Alaska to meet a man you found on the Internet?"

I laugh, the sound a little higher pitched than it should be because he thinks it's worse than it is, and that’s a little bit of a relief. "No. I met him in Nashville."

Holden is still watching me with an appraising gaze. "So he came to Nashville to meet you."

Holy shit. Is this how Vincent feels when I don't stop asking him questions? Probably, but I can't just tell them they can't ask me anything more, so I just plow forward. "Yeah. He came to meet me in Nashville."

Technically, he did.

Holden scoffs. "How long have you known this guy?"

I perk up a little because this answer is going to sound great. Especially compared to everything else. "Six months."

"And you didn't tell us about him before now?" Holden almost looks hurt.

Obviously that answer wasn't as great as I expected it to be.

"I just wasn't sure where it was going to go." Technically, I’m still not sure where it's going.

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