Page 126 of Crush

Max stepped back and dropped his hands, before jamming his fingers through his wet hair, “You’re wrong. It’s what’s in here that excites me,” Max said, placing his hand across my heart and a sob escaped me.

“You’re thewhole packageAmber, the real deal. If anything, I should be the one terrified.”

“What do you mean?” I said as a single tear slid down my cheek. Max wiped it away with his fingertip as his eyes searched my face.

“Terrified of losingyou. I’ve behaved like an absolute prick and treated you like shit.”

My brow threaded as I disagreed with him, “But you were only responding to my brattish behaviour.”

“No, that’snotthe case. Deep down I knew it was an act, that you were a decent person. But I didn’t care. I wasn’t going to make it about feelings. I wanted to sleep with you and then forget you. I kept telling myself that what was happening between us was just physical. Irefusedto see it as anything else. I’ve been such an arrogant dick, to women in general I get that now but with you, I was at my worst. God knows I’ve treated women so heartlessly in the past, always so certain that I could never love anyone more than I love myself. But I was wrong. Ever since I kissed you outside the restaurant that day, you unleashed something inside of me. Youforcedme into a direction I never intended to go and I was angry with you. I blamed you for making me feel weak. You unmanned me, something no other woman has ever done and now I know why.”

“Why?” I whispered almost breathlessly, hope surging inside me.

His palm touched my face tenderly. “Because I love you.”

My entire chest lifted as I drew in more oxygen and that ocean of misery lifted, “Youloveme?”

“So, fucking much.” My heart was beating so fast as Max half-growled, “You got under my skin, right from the beginning and I loveeverythingabout you.”

“But I’ve been such a bitch.”

“And I’ve been a bastard. So, we were clearly well matched.”

Max kissed my nose.

“And now I want all of you. The goodandthe bad, but I come with baggage too. And that’s the point, isn’t it?Everyonehas it. I had pretended to be perfectfor so long that I had started to believe it—until youmorethan knocked me down a peg or two. You opened my eyes, Amber. And I know I’ve behaved badly, but love can turn the sanest man into a beast.”

“Or the sanest woman into a bitch,” I replied, seeing the entire situation with fresh eyes.

“I love you, witheverything, my heart, my mind as well as my body.”

“I love you too, you know that don’t you?” I choked out, throwing my arms around his neck and pushing up on my tip toes.

Our mouths collided in mid-air as Max kissed me passionately so much so that my toes curled.

He drew back, gazing down into my face, his true feelings reflected there for the first time. “I’d hoped that was the case but I wasn’t sure. I was a gutless fool thinking you’d reject me. God, I love you so much. We’re the same Amber, we’re like two halves of the same soul.”

What he was saying made perfect sense. How wrong we’d both been, how utterly stupid and blind. There had been something between us from that very first moment, that night at the party when Max had called me The Little Mermaid.

“I think you’re right Max. I wasterrifiedof letting anyone else in until you but you saw through my bullshit. You made me feel happy again. That night at my father’s party was the first time I had properly laughed in years and then we spent the night together. It was like we connected, beyond what happened in the bedroom. I was confused by my emotions and terrified of opening my heart again.”

Max smiled, “Today, when I thought of you being taken away from me, I realised that I can’t live without you.”

“I can’t live without you either.” I caressed his rough cheek. He was so beautiful to me.

“I want you Amber,allof you. Please say you’ll be mine. No one else’s, just us together against the world. Let meadoreyou.”

“Yes, a thousand times yes, I love you so much, Max.” I didn’t care that I sounded as mushy as hell.

Our mouths met again and Max lifted me into his arms and carried me into my bedroom, carefully kicking the door shut with his bare foot.

He carried me to the bed and laid me down. “It won’t be easy, you know. We can both be stubborn but fuck me, I’m looking forward to the ride.”

I was in a dreamy-eyed state of blissful contentment.

Max made love to me so thoroughly, it was intense and full of feeling and I realised how far I had come.

Part of my kinks in the past were due to that need to feel punished. My guilt was always so close to the surface. But now I realised that itwasover. Icouldlove a man if he was therightman.

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