Page 14 of Troy

I wander downstairs and head for the back door—Troy explained the alarm system earlier so I know how to shut it off before opening the door. The night is still warm and I can hear cicadas in the trees surrounding the back yard. There is nothing but darkness, the black night sky alive with brightly shining stars. It is so peaceful; I could live here. Pulling a cigarette from the pack, I flick my lighter to ignite it. Drawing in a deep breath, the smoke hits my lungs and I relax as the thoughts of my old life slide back into the dark, locked box they came from. It’s been years since I thought back to that night, and the consequences of it on my life. Who knows where I would be without the help, love, and support of my great-aunt; she showered me with the love I should have had from my family. She supported my life choices and secured me on the right path. I owe her everything, yet she asked for nothing.

My feet on the edge of the decking, I rock as I clear my mind from the negativity. I’ve almost finished my cigarette when I hear the light pad of bare footsteps coming up behind me.

Troy’s arms wrap around my waist as he stands behind me. “That’s a horrible habit, Mr. McMahon, but damn it; you look fucking sexy with a cigarette hanging out of your mouth.”

His mouth presses against the nape of my neck, making me shiver. Circling in his arms, I smile. “You like it, do you? How long have you been watching me for?”

“Just a minute; you looked so locked in thought, I didn’t want to disturb you. Is everything okay?” Troy’s dark chocolate eyes wash over my face as he tries to work out what is wrong.

“Yeah, baby, everything is good. I had a few demons raging in my head and I needed some fresh air to clear my head. I’m sorry if I disturbed you.” Turning back to look up at the sky again, I utter, “d’you realize that, by the time we see the light of these stars, they have burnt out and no longer exist?”

“I did know that, but why do you mention it?” Troy questions.

“No reason really, it’s just the feeling that we are gazing on something that is no longer around and still we gaze at its beauty, holding on to the fact that it was real once and it shone so brightly when it was. Time is so fleeting, yet so infinite.”

“I think that’s a beautiful way of looking at life and the world.” Troy pensively studies the stars again and I know he’s analyzing my words, I hope he understands why I said it. I lean in for a kiss, gently brushing my lips over Troy’s. I hear him moan quietly at the back of his throat. Pulling away, I raise one brow questioningly.

“I’ve never kissed a man who smoked, I always thought I would hate it. But your mouth tastes so fucking good and the smoke just makes it better. Fuck, Raff, I can’t get enough of you.” Troy’s mouth twitches with a quirky smile then he moves back in for another.

I can’t keep my hands off him; they roam over his shoulders and back, clutching and pulling him closer to me. As his caress my back they reach down and cup my ass cheeks, immediately making me aware of our almost nakedness. I’m only in my sleep shorts but Troy, oh God, Troy is in nothing but tight-fitting boxer trunks. I can feel him hardening against my own, growing erection. “Shit, Troy, we need to stop. C’mon, baby, not here. Not like this.” Breathlessly, I pull back, desperate to take it further but knowing it’s not the right time.

Troy steps back and lifts his head. All I see is passion blazing in his hooded eyes, his kiss-swollen, parted lips—glistening from my tongue—shining in the moonlight.

“Fuck this, get upstairs, Troy, and get in my bed.” I press my mouth hard against his and kiss him only once, then grab his hand and lead him indoors. Locking the door behind us and quickly resetting the alarm, I stride towards the stairs and up to my bedroom. My only thought concerns how soon I can get him in my mouth before my cock is buried deep in his ass.

We stand outside my open bedroom door when I feel a minute hesitation in Troy’s hand as I move to enter my room. Turning to look at the object of my dreams and desires, my heart drops. “No worries, baby, we’ve got forever.”

“No, no, it’s not that. I want you, I just don’t want you in Nico’s bed.” He smiles sweetly, “I want you in my bed, Rafferty.”

Normally, I avoid being called by my full name, even though it’s one I chose myself. Full names still remind me of my father’s anger and fists, but slipping sweetly from Troy’s lips makes my stomach clench.

“Are you sure? Baby, this doesn’t have to happen.” I’m aching for this man but I need it to be right.

“Just come to my room and we can take it from there.” This time it’s Troy’s hand that leads and I follow willingly. And then we step through his doorway. I don’t know what I expected. A shrine to his true love, perhaps? But no, there are photographs scattered around the room, on dressers and book shelves, but they are of Nico and Troy or of friends surrounding Troy. It’s an exquisite room with lots of rich fabrics in gold, bronze and browns. Lush comforters, large, plump cushions thrown casually on chairs and the floor, where, it seems, Troy has discarded them from his bed.

I regard his bed and wonder if it’s the same one he shared with Franco; I imagine it is, it is a beautiful bed and would be hard to replace. I envision the memories of so many good times, loving times, he would want to hold on to and I can’t begrudge him those. It’s time to make some new ones for him here. Troy faces me as I take it all in before coming back to his face. He bites the corner of his bottom lip, giving his anxiety away.

“Come here, baby,” I pull Troy back to me and wrap my arms around his shoulders, “this is your call, Troy. I don’t need anything from you.” Lowering my mouth to his, I drop a chaste kiss to his lips and pried away.

“Shit, Raff, the feelings you bring out in me. I’m nervous and excited and don’t want to fuck it up.”

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