Page 18 of Blood on the Ice

Well, at least one decision I’ve made since I arrived isn’t a disaster.

Droppinginto my desk chair with a heavy sigh, I kick my shoes off under the desk and fold myself into a pretzel in the chair. Thinking about last night makes my head and my body throb—for different reasons. I still don’t know what happened with Lucas or why everything came to an abrupt halt. At times like this, I wish I’d dated around more than I did. I was always so focused on my career and rising in the ranks at Swallowtail that I looked at sex more as a physical need than an emotional one. Before Magnus, I only dated seriously a handful of times and most of them were more towards the magical or mythical end of the species spectrum—not the more animalistic shifters—so I’m lost.

It would be easier if every damn supe type didn’t have their own weird sexual habits and behaviors, but I guess that’s not realistic, is it?

I pick up the first pile of papers, hoping to distract my wandering mind with the approved expenditures. I’m sure the things that were approved before I arrived will anger me and maybe it will keep me from thinking about the affair that wassupposedto be a fling. Squinting at the first page, I see an outrageous amount of money allocated to new football uniforms. I’m not stupidenough to even consider messing withthatbudget yet; it’s a hornet’s nest of alumni, coaches, and very involved families that have been around since this place was founded.

That means this page just gets a checkmark in the top right corner and I move on. Gradually, I tackle the pile of invoices, occasionally frowning at a few. Most of it makes sense and though I believe they could save money by exploring different vendors, I can justify a good number of the various expenses. However, a few literally scream ‘something is wrong here,’ andthoseI set aside to submit to the forensic accountant the board gave me access to. Either the amounts or descriptions tweaked my suspicions, and by the time I read through the details, I knew there was a problem. However, I need experts to verify this before using it against anyone.

I won’t make many friends here by the time I’m done cleaning house.

My brows furrow and I put the papers down, opening the laptop on my desk. Everything about my life now is depressing—I can’t even get laid without it becoming a giant mess. That brings me back to Lucas and the weird behavior and I drop my head to my desk, banging it on the wood in frustration. I amnota clingy, easily attached woman; this has to be a function of the damage my asshole ex did. Never in my life have I been this obsessed with a random person I banged and I cannotfigure out why it’s happening now. The timing is shit and I have to get myself together.

But how? I’m sure as hell not contacting him first.

With a low growl, I open the browser, ducking under the VPN I installed so I can browse with no trace. Perhaps some research will ease my worries.

The time fliesby as I scroll through the various sites looking for information on various supes and their proclivities. I have to pick through the listings so I’m not hitting accidental porn, but it’s a lot to take in even without moaning people on the screen. I suddenly feel sheltered and naïve, considering my age. My relationships in the past were with a dragon, a warlock, a vampire coven, and twin demi-gods. Nothing they did seemed out of the ordinary for the sex ed I received in school and their kinks were pretty standard.

According to the internet, I’ve been missing out. Animal shifters have widely varied behaviors even before you throw in shifting. Fae are a smorgasbord of species related shit. All that is before I even get to the more rare mythical creatures like sirens, oracles, hounds, or phoenixes. Putting my face in my hands, I feel color rushing to my cheeks as I try to process exactly how stupid I feel at the moment. Worst of all, I’m no closer to finding out why Lucas got wigged out.

Morgana LeCiel, accept there are things you aren’t an expert in and deal with it.

My inner voice of reason is right, but that doesn’t mean I like it. Intelligence was highly valued in the world I grew up in and I feel like the class dunce at the moment. It’s sitting like a stone in my gut and I don’t know what to do with that. My usual method won’t work here. On the surface, it sounds like a fun challenge, but I know it would bring more trouble to my doorstep.

Plus, it wouldn’t change whatever happened last night, even if it helped me understand. I rub my temples as anxiety plagues me, hoping to calm my nerves. My life is in such shambles since the truth about Magnus came out and nothing I do balances it out. It’s like I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t. I hate it and I want off this fucking merry-go-round of bullshit.

I need space, and I need it now.

I push the button on the intercom, hoping it’s set up the way it should be. I’ve not used it yet, so hell if I know. “Channing?”

“Yes, Dean?”

“First, call me Morgana. Second, I’m stepping out for a bit. I need some air, but I’ll be back. The stack of reviewed, approved expenses is sitting on the left corner of my desk. The ones next to it are the ones I need to look into.”

“Got it. Have a pleasant break, Morgana.”

I shake my head at her chipper tone and slip my shoes back on. Heading out onto the balcony, I touch my amulet and take off as soon as my wings escape.

The sky is my safety, and that’s where I’m headed for a while.

do my own thing

“Kaspar, is that what I think it is?”

My bodyguard narrows his eyes and looks up to see what I’m pointing at. The shadow gliding through the air in the clouds continues on its way, but my old friend grunts in his typically grumpy fashion. “Yes. It appears to be the new Dean, Prince Liam.”

I roll my eyes at his insistence on formality in public. It’s annoying as hell and I can’t get him to budge, even when I try ordering him not to act like he has a stick up his ass. “She has an impressive wingspan. I’ve met gargoyles of all sizes and shapes, but seeing one backlit against the afternoon sun makes her form a little awe-inspiring.”

“She’s not that big.” Kas shrugs as he looks around. “I’m not worried.”

I wasn’t saying he should be worried; even if the woman murdered her ex-fiance, I don’t think she’d risk execution for harming a prince from the Daybreak Court.

“You assume everything is a threat, old friend. Sometimes, it’s nice to simply enjoy the scenery.”

The storm dragon snorts, shaking his head. “That’s not my job, Prince.”

“Kas, you’re only five years older than me. Your brother and I went to Miyako together. Stop acting like some hotshot bodyguard and benormal,” I chide. This time he rolls his eyes at me and I walk towards the Humanities building again. “You know, my parents chose State U for the safety it offered. A Masters in Poli Sci would be much more meaningful from Harvard or Yale, but SU has both the best supe politics professors and a mostly non-human student population. Weshouldbe okay on campus.”