Page 74 of Forty

“It’s not safe. You stay here.”

“They hate me here.”

“Stay in my room. They’ll leave you alone.”

Her brow’s furrowing, and she’s getting fidgety. “Take me with you.”

“It’s club business.” I say it without thinking. My dad said it to my mom all the time.

We’re trekking back to the clubhouse, and she stops in her tracks. I turn, exasperated. I don’t want to be leaving her either.

She’s trying to keep her face blank, but her eyes are sparking. She’s pissed. “What am I?”

“What do you mean?” There isn’t time for this now.

We’re ten feet from the door. We’ve been searching for this guy for two weeks straight. I want to get this shit settled. Get back to normal so Nevaeh’s safe, and I can give her more than a few hours at night when I’m exhausted as hell.

She jerks her chin at the clubhouse. “That’s business. What am I?”

“Nevaeh. Please. We got to do this now?”

“I just want to know where I rank. Which place do I get? Am I second to club business? Third?”

“You’re being dramatic.”

She grits her teeth and sucks in a huge breath to let me have it. I’m happy to listen, but not now. She can rip me a new asshole after she’s safe from the Raiders.

“Listen.” I grab her upper arms. “I don’t want to fight. You know old ladies aren’t involved in club business.”

Deb and Harper are exceptions. And it’s not a sexist thing—not anymore. It’s about plausible deniability and protecting our families from the shit that isn’t legit.

Nevaeh’s not saying anything. Her lips are pressed together in a thin line, her hip’s cocked, and she’s glaring at me like I’m supposed to read her mind.

“You’ll be fine. I’ll be back soon, and we’ll talk. I need you to trust me on this.” I loosen my hold and smooth my hands down her arms.

She narrows her eyes and wrinkles her nose. I can’t help it. I drop a kiss on the tip. She huffs.

“Trust me. Okay?”

She draws in a deep breath and forces the corners of her lips up. “Okay. I’ll wait in your room. When you come back, we’ll talk. I’ll trust you.”

She starts back toward the clubhouse, her steps calm and measured. I should feel reassured. That’s what I wanted to hear.

But a trickle of dread runs down my spine, and as she disappears through the door, the feeling strikes me again, an old, forgotten sensation from those last days before I left for Basic.

I’m missing something.

But Heavy and Nickel are heading toward me, expressions deadly serious. I will fix this when I get back. In the meantime, she’s safe.

10

NEVAEH

Ilast four whole hours sitting alone in Forty’s bedroom, lonely and bored, feeling like I’m sixteen and grounded, before I decide to take my chances down in the common room. Fay-Lee or Crista might still be around, and there are pool tables and darts. And I’m so freakin’ hungry. All I had to eat today was chips and pop.

I’m also deeply uneasy, and each time I nail down the source of my anxiety, my brain skips to another thing to freak out about.

Forty probably just headed into real danger. Fay-Lee is not discreet; she drops little nuggets all the time. This war with the Rebel Raiders is no joke. Fay-Lee and Story were both attacked and a prospect was nearly beaten to death. There are rumors about a standoff behind a gas station on Gracy Avenue, men disappearing.

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