Page 59 of Forty

An awful heat blooms in my chest. My face burns. And I’ve got that feeling. That end of the rope, about to let go, crazy, wild feeling.That’s not gonna work out?

“So.” I smile with all my teeth. “Did you two bang yet? Or am I reading this right and you guys are still in thewill they,won’t theyphase?”

Mike has rejoined us with his drink, and he’s mid-sip when he does a spit take.

I hold up my palms. “Don’t let me get in the way. I’m just the ex who woke up to his dick in her ass this morning.”

Mike hacks so hard he has to lean for balance on the bubble gum machine.

I cover my mouth. “Oops. That came out wrong. His dick wasn’tinmy ass. It was nestledagainstmy ass.”

Amelia’s mouth is hanging open. If my heart didn’t feel like it just got stomped by a boot, this would be really entertaining.

“I mean, his dick has been in my ass plenty in the past. But not this morning. Just wanted to clarify that.”

“Nevaeh,” Forty growls in warning. Fuck him. I don’t have to play nice with the corporate ladder climber he’s trying to nail.

I don’t have to play nice with him, either. You know what? I don’t have to play with him at all. Where is this getting me? Not back to my man, the one who’d never in a million years leave me alone in parking lots or let there be a single doubt in anyone’s mind that I belonged to him.

That man doesn’t exist. Maybe he lives in the past. Maybe only ever in my imagination.

My head swirls as all my blood sinks to my feet. Reality glares at me, her neck set back, nose wrinkled in disgust, coral red lips pressed into a thin, disapproving line.

But there’s no white knight rushing to save me. Not from monsters or mobsters or being embarrassed as hell in Duck’s Diner.

There’s just this man. Stuck in his pride. Can’t see what’s in front of him. Likes me well enough on my knees, but doesn’t think I’m quite worth it in the broad daylight.

Yeah, fuck that.

“Did you drive?” I ask Mike who’s finally managed to breathe again.

“Uh. Yeah. I have a Hyundai.”

“All right. I like Hyundais. Can you give me a ride somewhere?”

Mike’s eyes fly to Forty. Fuckthat, too. “You don’t need his permission.”

“Nevaeh.” Forty’s voice is an octave lower. Oh, he’s serious now, is he?

“It’s your lucky day, Amelia. Forty here can give you a ride on his motorcycle, or you can ride along while Mike gives me a lift. Your choice.”

“Uh, the, uh, server. I really need to get back to work—Wereally need to get back.” Mike’s physically cowering, and all Forty’s doing is raising an eyebrow at him. “Uh, maybe you could call a ride share?”

Oh, Mike. You disappoint me.

This day is turning into a shit sandwich. No ride. No Reuben. I’m sure as hell not asking Forty to front my ten bucks so I can get something to eat while he firms up a date with his tall, blonde, ideal rejection of everything I am.

No glimmer of hope that I can mend something, make something work out for me finally.

Well, at least my feet work.

“Nevaeh, wait for me at the table.” Forty jerks his chin at a booth. Oh, he still thinks this is me making a scene and him playing the put-upon, long-suffering man.

I flip him the bird as I walk out the door.

As the screen door slams, I catch a glimpse of Amelia getting up in Forty’s face, as she starts, “You never said you were—"

I jog through the parking lot and down the block, heading toward the waterfront. Hopefully, Amelia buys me some time. I don’t want to do this anymore. I don’t want to keep reaching out, opening up, just to get slapped back down.

---