Page 21 of Dare to Need

With my left hand, I wiped away the drying tears from my cheeks and took in a deep breath. “I can’t even imagine what it was like for you and mom to grow up the way you did. You both gave Garrett and me everything we could need and you were able to do that because you worked hard and had conviction in the choices you made.”

My head dipped low as I tried to work through the next words I was about to say. Lifting my chin, I looked my father in the eyes and said, “For my entire life, dad, I wanted to beyou. I wanted to do the same thing—build my own empire from the ground up with no one’s help. I wanted to throw myself into something that mademehappy and work hard to turn it into something lucrative. I didn’t want to be one of those guys who sat back and reaped the benefits of what their parents sowed before them. I wanted to be the one who did it all—just like you did.”

His eyes widened a little, as though the words I was saying were a complete surprise to him. If I was being honest with myself, they were a surprise to me too. Though I knew deep down that it was the truth and had been for a really long time. I just wanted to be like my dad. Live up to the legacy he created for our family, but in a way that was truly my own.

“But what I realized”—I swallowed hard against the lump in my throat—“is that I was being a stubborn, selfish ass. While I was trying to focus on all the things I wanted to do, I was neglecting my duty as the eldest Walker son. I let you down...” There was no fighting against the sob that broke through my lips. “And now...and now you’re really sick. I can’t help but think that if I had just taken over the business and let you teach me the ropes, that this never would have happened.”

Just as he tried to say something, I cut him off again. “What I wanted to tell you the most, dad, is that I’m ready. I’m ready to stop fighting you.”

With as much confidence as I could muster at that moment, I squared my shoulders and looked him right in the eyes. “I’m ready to take over the Walker Corporation.”

ChapterNine

EVA

“Two Americanos”—I stole a glance at the bagels in the display window—“and one blueberry bagel and one everything bagel please.”

“We will have that right out for you,” the cashier said as I handed her my debit card.

Taking back the tiny plastic rectangle, I grabbed a seat in one of the oversized leather chairs. It was hard to imagine that this was going to be my city of residence in a few short months. People from all walks of life passed by the giant windows, some with their attention buried in their phones, others looking all around them with bright wide eyes.

The cafe was filled to the brim with patrons. Most were stopping by to get their fix before they set out to accomplish whatever was on their to-do list for the day. Others were holed-up in the corners of the shop, headphones in and eyes glued to laptops.

I wondered if I would find a place like this close to wherever I ended up living in the city. It would be nice to have something consistent in the ever-changing bustle of the big city.

Minutes ticked by as I tried to lose myself in the observation of others. My mind wasn’t quite ready to think of all the things happening with Garth and his family, so I found a bit of distraction in watching others.

Expert hands of the baristas moved elegantly across the machines as they fulfilled orders for the anticipating patrons. While most of those in the cafe seemed to be alone, just waiting to get their fix, there were a few couples paired off.

A short man with a shaved head had his arm wrapped around his partner, a man with dark skin and a tall lean build. The way they looked at one another reminded me of how Garth and I looked at each other. Stealing little moments for ourselves, even amongst the sea of the public. It was clear the two men were deeply in love—when one moved, the other followed as though nothing could weaken the magnetic pull they had toward one another.

I tried not to let the view of them eat away at me. But it was so damn hard knowing that Garth was hurting and I had yet to discover a way to help him through this. If I was honest with myself, I just wanted more time. Enough time to really solidify what we had before we were hit with another difficult situation. But if there was one thing I’d learned about life, it was that it never waited for us to be prepared before throwing us into the turmoil of a storm.

Guilt was a difficult emotion to navigate and my mind liked to run toward it when I thought about the beginning of our relationship. All the shit I put him through, continuing to give Connor chance after chance while Garth waited patiently for me.

Not even a year had gone by and the next major hurdle jettisoned toward us with life-changing consequences. It was overwhelming. Far above anything I’d ever dealt with and I felt like I was drowning in worry. The look Garth had on his face when his mother gave him the news about his father would forever be etched into my mind.

I tried to tell myself that it would pass. Once his father was strong enough to be his normal self again, things would go back to normal and Garth would be okay. Time was all he needed. But deep down, I knew that phone call would leave an everlasting impression on him as well.

There was no pretending that I knew how he felt. I couldn’t even imagine one of my parents falling ill. Especially if I had a strained relationship with them and it felt like there was no time to fix the rift.

Every time I looked at Garth, I could see the war building within himself. I wasn’t sure exactly what war he was fighting, but I knew it caused him distress. Enough to make him waver from his normal strong disposition.

The barista called my name, breaking through the barrage of thoughts that were quickly tiring me out. If I was going to be Garth’s strength, I needed to get all this under wraps before I got back to our room.

The soothing scent of coffee beans wafted through the air as I took the paper to-go cups and bag of bagels from the barista. Sounds of dripping coffee and steaming milk reminded me of a simpler time, back in Garth’s loft. Early mornings filled with blissful love-making and deep conversations over steaming cups of espresso.

My heart clenched as I thought back to a time, only two days ago, that was simpler. When we were able to explore one another and build upon the relationship that started on shaky legs. Now, I couldn’t help but feel that all the stability we’d created for one another was starting to crumble under the pressure of this new stressor.

And all I wanted to do was fix it.

I tried to halt my worries as I made the quick walk from the little cafe to our hotel. Maybe I could talk to his mom at some point and see if she knew what I could do to help make things better for Garth.

I managed a smile at the doorman as he gave me a subtle nod before he swung open the large glass door, ushering me inside.

Garth was likely still asleep, but I took a few deep breaths to calm myself in case he was awake. I didn’t want him to see the worry that was starting to make my stomach unsettled. I had to be strong for him.

“Ms. Eva Barnes?”