Page 2 of Dare to Need

A candy-apple red mini-dress with a pleated skirt sat on the left and a pale yellow A-line sundress was on the right. With graduation being outside this year, there was no way I could get away with wearing a floor-length gown in the Florida heat. So I’d opted for short summer-appropriate dresses instead so I wouldn’t burst into flames under the graduation gown. I’d made it this far and I didn’t want to pass out from a heat stroke on the biggest day of my life.

I wished Drema was here. After the dust settled from the fall semester and the screaming match I had with Paulina at the lake downtown, Drema and I had spent the last several months either glued to each others’ sides or with Garth and Lucas. We both cried when she told me she got the art internship in Italy—both happy and sad tears. Aside from Garth, Drema was the light in my life. My closest friend and confidant.

I was so proud of her for taking a chance and doing something for herself. The internship in Italy was a once-in-a-lifetime experience and even if she would be gone for four months during the summer, I was excited for her. I was even more excited when she told me that Lucas had decided to take a summer sabbatical and travel to Italy with her.

Although, as I looked in the mirror and back to the dresses on the bed, I wished she would have left after graduation instead of two weeks before. This was our moment. And if it weren’t for Garth’s and her’s support, there was no way I would have had the guts to change my major and graduate with a degree for something I would actually enjoy doing for the rest of my life.

A little pang hit my chest as I thought about crossing that stage without her. I tried to will it away as I reached for the little red number to try on again.

Just as I reached for the dress, my phone pinged from Garth’s nightstand. It was probably Garth letting me know he was on his way home. After Drema left, I’d spent the last several nights at his place so I didn’t have to be alone. I was so thankful he’d offered for me to stay with him before we left to visit my family after graduation. The thought of being alone right now was nerve-racking.

I knew I should have been filled with excitement and joy. This was the moment I had worked my ass off for over the past four years. I deserved this. And I knew things would be different once I started working. It was the closure of a major chapter in my life—in more ways than one.

When I walked across that stage, it would be a symbol of everything I had to look forward to and everything I had left behind. It brought back all the strange conflicting emotions that I went through last fall. I was glad that Garth had been there with me so I could talk it all out. He’d always been the best sounding board and I was thankful he gave me the space to sort through everything out loud.

When my phone pinged for a second time, I grabbed it and tapped on the glass. My breath hitched the moment I saw the name on the banner across the screen. As though my thoughts of last fall had summoned her, I just stared at Paulina’s name, my heart a heavy leaden rock in my chest.

Frozen, I battled in my mind over what I wanted to do. Part of me was shaking with the urgency to throw my phone across the room so I’d never be able to see her name again. While another part of me, perhaps the more masochistic part, wanted to see what she could possibly have to say after everything she’d already done.

It still didn’t make sense to me. None of it did. There was no logical reason why she would have leaked Connor’s affair to news outlets, then pretend likeIwas the person who did it. I wondered if there was a part of her that had been jealous of what I once had with Connor and the moment she was able to take that away from me, she seized it. And I wondered even more how long she’d known about the affair. How long they’dallknown and chose to let me flounder like an idiot.

There was no questioning that Caroline would have been fine with keeping it a secret and Brent practically did everything Caroline told him to. Maybe that was it. Maybe all three of them knew and Paulina didn’t want to rock the boat with Brent, thinking that maybe sticking with them would give her a better chance to be with him in the future.

I shook my head as my thoughts continued to roam all over the place. This wasn’t doing me any good, questioning the actions of those who hurt me beyond measure. If I was honest with myself, I knew that finding out the true reason why Paulina did what she did wouldn’t change anything. It wouldn’t lead me to forgive her. Our friendship would never be able to overcome what had happened.

But that self-loathing side that hadn’t fully healed won out as I slid my finger across the screen to open her text message.

Paulina:Eva, I’m so sorry. I’ve had a lot of time to think about what I’ve done and I can’t stand myself. I hurt you and I ruined our friendship. I want to explain everything if you’ll just give me another chance. Please. I’m so sorry.

Somewhere in the back of my fuming mind, I heard the front door of Garth’s loft open just as I threw my phone across the room. I regretted it the moment I heard the screen shatter against the hardwood floors.

“Doll face?”

Embarrassment flushed my cheeks as I slowly turned toward Garth’s voice. Not a single ounce of frustration marked his face even though there was probably a giant scratch on his beautiful floors where my phone lay.

“I’m sorry,” I mumbled. “I probably shouldn’t have done that.”

The right edge of his lips tilted up as he cocked his head to the side. “I know you’ve always had a feisty side, but I didn’t take you to be a phone thrower.”

My shoulders sagged as another wave of embarrassment flooded me. I should have known better than to read anything from her. It was difficult to contain my feelings when issues of my past threatened the happiness I’d worked so hard to build. It was such a fragile thing—happiness. I was still so new to all of this that it felt like the smallest thing could bring it all crumbling down on me.

Garth bridged the gap between us and that all too familiar spark seared my skin as he lifted my chin with his fingertips. Curiosity and concern danced in his bright hazel eyes.

“What’s wrong, Eva?” His voice was as smooth as honey.

“Paulina texted me.”

A flicker of anger flashed across his face. “And judging by the state of your phone, I’d assume you read it.”

His fingers felt warm under my chin as I nodded. A muscle in his jaw ticked. Then he grazed the side of my face with his fingers before sliding his palm over my cheek.

“Why don’t I make us some coffee and you can tell me about it.”

I sighed. “I really don’t want to.”

“It always makes you feel better though.” He kissed my forehead and released my cheek before he made his way into the kitchen. Donning my favorite ensemble of his—a v-neck white t-shirt and dark denim jeans, I couldn’t help but admire his broad shoulders and taut ass. It was the only part of him walking away from me that I enjoyed.

A disgruntled huff left me as I padded into the kitchen behind him. The leather stool felt cool against the backs of my thighs as I plopped onto it.

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