Page 54 of Dare to Fall

“How do you know about this place?”

I waited for the usual discomfort to settle in when someone started asking questions that would lead to a discussion about my family. But it never came. There was no worry that Eva was going to find out who my father was and learn that I came from money. I hardly had any evidence to suggest everything would be fine, but somehow, I just knew. The weight I carried around from the stress of hiding who my family was started to melt away. It felt like coming up for air after being submerged in water for a very long time.

“It’s actually my father’s building. He owns a few throughout the city, but this one has the best view. It’s the only spot I’ve found where I can see the stars at night amidst the bright lights of the city.”

She turned her head toward me and smiled. “The beach was always my go-to spot for stargazing. My neighborhood wasn’t quite as distracting from the sky as the city is, but there was no better place to see the stars than at the beach. A few of my friends and I would have bonfires on the beach during our breaks from school. But I always somehow managed to find myself there alone a few nights out of the month.”

Her head tilted back as she gazed back up at the stars.

“It was always the best place to think.” She sighed. “Things were so much simpler back then.”

I exchanged her hand to my right hand as I propped myself up on my left elbow to get a better view of her as I said, “Things can be just as simple now as they were back then. All you have to do is make choices that lead you to a simpler life.”

“You make it sound so easy.”

“The decisionsareeasy, Eva. The only thing that holds us back is our willingness to stay content. But I can promise you that contentment will never make you feel alive.”

“I think life is more complicated than that.”

“Life is only as complicated as you make it.”

She let out a frustrated huff. I rubbed a circle over her hand with the pad of my thumb. She raised our hands upward and extended her fingers so that our palms were flat against each other.

“Like this, with you. It feels…right.” Her eyes flicked to mine and back down to our hands. “I can’t explain it. But every time I’m around you, everything feels intense. It’s like all my senses are on overload, and I feel everything to a greater degree. And somehow, I still feel calm. Like nothing in the world could possibly hurt me when I’m with you.”

She trailed her fingertips down the palm of my hand onto the bottom of my forearm. My blood raged to the surface in the wake of her touch. I watched her intently as she brought her fingertips to the front side of my arm and traced upward, back to my hand. My pulse quickened as her body drifted toward mine.

“I need you to know…” I trailed off as she tilted her head back and looked up at me. The reflection of the stars were bright in her deep brown eyes.

“Know what?” she breathed, our lips inches apart.

Her eyelids fluttered closed as she leaned into me. A trace of her crimson lips brushed against mine. Desire coiled through me as I peered down at the beautiful woman who captivated my mind, body, and soul. I was falling for her in a way I didn’t think I was ever capable of. And she wanted me to kiss her. In this very moment, Eva Barnes was inviting me to claim her as my own.

But a little flicker of doubt crept into my mind that prevented me from fulfilling her request. So, I slid my hand up the side of her moonlit face and cupped her cheek. As her eyes opened, she looked at me with furrowed brows.

“What’s wrong?”

I trailed my thumb over her bottom lip that I so desperately wanted to kiss but couldn’t.

“Eva, I want nothing more than to kiss your pretty little mouth right now. I want to hold your body against mine under this gorgeous night sky and show you exactly how I feel and can’t find the words to say. But I can’t do any of that until I know that you are no longer with Connor.”

“Are you serious?” She pulled back from me, and the same pained look she had on her face at the exhibit shadowed her delicate features again. “I told you earlier that he cheated on me, and you think I’m going to go back to him?”

“I believe that you’re probably feeling really upset and confused today. And I don’t want to add to that confusion by kissing you when you’re still in a relationship with another man. If you decide to end things with him, I will be here, waiting for you. But I won’t cross that line until you make your decision.”

Tears welled in her eyes as she pulled farther away and rose to her feet.

“I want to go home now,” she said as I stood up with her.

“Eva, please.” I reached out for her, but she turned away and headed for the stairwell door. As I watched her walk away, I couldn’t help but wonder if I’d just made the biggest mistake of my life.

28

Eva

I staredat my sunken in eyes in the bathroom mirror. Remnants of last night’s makeup clung to my skin. I picked at the dried mascara on my eyelashes, tiny flecks of black dust falling onto my cheekbones. After Garth dropped me off at my apartment last night, I checked in on Drema then went straight to my room and spent the majority of the night hours sobbing.

Everything was a fucking mess.

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