Page 1 of Dare to Fall

1

Eva

Rays of warmthshined across my face as my eyes fluttered open. The gorgeous Florida sunshine peeked through the blinds of my apartment window. Mornings were my favorite part of the day. A brand-new beginning filled with so many possibilities. The smell of fresh coffee sizzling as it dropped into the pot. The crisp air that was yet to be tainted by the thickness of humidity.

But this morning was even more special. It was the first day of classes for my senior year at Waterview University. Carefully planned since I was a sophomore in high school, today marked the beginning of my fourth year as a pre-medical student. Thankfully, the heavy course loads of my freshman, sophomore, and junior years at Waterview were over, and I could get a little bit of a respite with my art minor. There were moments last year when I pulled seventy-two hours straight of hard-core studying—thanks to my boyfriend’s Adderall.

This year would be different, though. Two pre-medical courses and two art courses.

A theoretically perfect combination. Art had been my lifeline throughout the first two years of college, and I couldn’t wait to dive further into it. Though, I’d keep that to myself.

A long yawn escaped my throat as I lifted my arms overhead and gave my body a much needed stretch.

A ping sounded from my nightstand, and I rolled over to grab my phone. A text from my best friend, Paulina, lit up the home screen. I tapped the glass screen to pop it open.

Paulina:Girllll! Get your lazy ass out of bed. We have so much to catch up on. Let’s walk to Biochem together.

A smile formed on my lips as my fingers flew across the screen with expert precision—perks of growing up in a world of technology.

Me:We still have an hour before class starts, you psycho.I need my coffee before I can even have a conversation. You know this.

Paulina:Ugh. Whatever. Meet me in the courtyard in 30?

Me:Yes! See you then.

I tossed my phone back onto the nightstand and threw the lavender-colored duvet off my legs. The tiled floor mimicking a beautiful cherry hardwood was freezing against the warmth of my feet. Chills ran down my body as I wrapped my arms around myself, dancing along the tile on my tiptoes, trying to minimize as much contact as possible.

Where the hell are my slippers?

Pink faux fur peeked out from under the bed skirt. I slid my feet into the furry slippers and fumbled into the kitchen where a large pot of glorious coffee awaited. Whoever invented delayed start on coffee pots was a fucking genius.

I filled a white ceramic mug with coffee and padded back into my room, careful not to disturb my roommate, Drema. Another alert pinged from my phone. I took a long swig of my coffee and regretfully checked the alert.

Ugh. Another MCAT reminder.

My boyfriend, Connor, insisted that we take the MCAT early in case our scores needed to be improved for applications. I hadn’t even started studying yet, and just the thought of opening the pile of workbooks on my desk made my throat feel tight.

This past summer had been perfection. Almost every afternoon, I got to lounge on the sandy Florida beach that graced the coast of my hometown. The surfing was excellent, and I actually slept through most nights.

Mornings were stolen from me, though, when Connor’s parents set up an externship for me at one of the local hospitals.

The sterile smell of antiseptic still stung my nose. It was the first time I got a glimpse into what my future would be like and also the first time it felt like there was something wrong with my path. And the feeling still nagged at me every time I thought about the bare walls of the hospital and the looming sense of death that clung in the air while I worked on the oncology wing.

I set my phone down with a thud and hopped back into the warmth of my bed, sipping on my favorite Colombian coffee.

Maybe the new internship Connor’s mom had set up for me would feel different. I planned to have the entire fall semester to prepare for the MCATs before my schedule became even more swamped with a twenty-hour-per-week internship on the pediatric wing in Orlando’s biggest hospital. Connor assured me that everyone feels a little bit intimidated by hospitals at first and that everything I felt during the summer would fade away once I found a specialization of medicine I enjoyed.

I hoped he was right, but it felt like more than that. Like something was missing. It wasn’t just the burned-out look of the nurses and physicians. I was even surprised when I didn’t cry after the first death of one of the patients I had been working with. It was as though I was already hardened against the humanity of it all. Or maybe it was the residual buildup of stress from classes.

I tapped my fingers on the mug, letting my thoughts roam. My eyes flicked back to my phone. Still no text from Connor, even though Paulina told me that he and his best friend, Brent, were back on campus a week ago.

We’d spent the entire summer apart. It was strange not having him with me back in our hometown. We did everything together. We shared the same friends and the same future of becoming doctors. I just hoped the summer months apart wouldn’t become our new reality when we went off to medical school.

A door squeaked open down the hall, and a head of fiery red curls popped out. Drema’s water-blue eyes met mine, and I shot her a smile.

“Good morning, sleepy head!” I called out to her.

A smile spread across her freckled face. “Good morning,” she said through a yawn.

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