Page 11 of Christmas Kisses

"Get up."

Is the date over?I feel weird about it all, but do as Ben says, anyway. He walks in front of me and stands there, just looking at me.

"Put your hand on my arm the way you did in the exercise."

I feel silly about doing it but do it anyway. My hand touches the sleeve of his forearm, and I realize he changed for ourdate. He had been wearing some work clothes before—and the toolbelt.

I squeeze his arm lightly and look into his eyes. They are so beautiful they threaten to hypnotize me. I feel the muscles of his arms twinge and respond to the pressure I've applied, even if just temporarily.

Suddenly, I feel like I'm touching a hot coal and I want to take my hand off him. This is too close, too personal. Ben starts talking again, and his voice soothes me.

"I can see in your eyes that you want to take your hand off me. Why don't we try leaving it on for a little bit longer while we talk?"

"What should we talk about?"

"Tell me something that makes you happy."

"Um, the shop is going to be so much cozier when all the booths are installed. People will come and hang out."

I smile up at him and take my hand off him. I can feel my face flushing already.

"Too much, too soon?" he asks.

"Yes."

"How would you feel if I'm the one putting my hand on you?"

"That's easy, I trust you."

"What if you didn't, though?"

"I'd step back before you could touch me." I frown.

"You didn't do that when the Mayor touched you the other day."

"Let's not talk about that."

I move to sit back down at the table. Reaching for my beverage, I hide my eyes behind the glass. Ben reluctantly sits down across from me once again.

"I think we should talk about it."

"It's not important," I say.

"I think it is, Sam. He's the reason you want these lessons, isn't he?"

I feel my heart constrict. Shame fills me, and I don't know how to answer his question, but I do it anyway.

"That's part of it."

"What's the rest?" He asks.

"Okay, fine, yes. I'd like to be able to have a conversation with him instead of him talking at me like I'm some silly schoolgirl. Is that so wrong?"

The frown leaves his face as I blurt out my confession.

"No, it's not wrong. A bit misguided, yes."

"What…How dare you?" I almost get up, but he puts his hand on mine to keep me seated.