Page 25 of Sins and Secrets

Richard is my mother’s husband, and Angie and Adam’s father. He has wrinkles and deep valleys by his eyes, and his hair has more gray peppering it than I remember. This is the man my mother abandoned me for. Funny, I never felt rage and hostility toward him as I did for everyone else.

“Do you want help getting him into the house?” I say, watching Adam curl into a fetal position.

There’s another long sigh from Richard. “Yeah, I guess.”

We spend the next couple of minutes dragging him into the living room, where Adam fully passess out.

Richard grabs his car keys. “Come on, I’ll take you back to the bar.” We ride in silence for the first few minutes. He’s started to talk a few times, but stopped each time before the words left his lips. “Got to say, I’m a little disappointed you didn’t call when you came back.”

This hits me hard. “I figured you guys were busy with your own lives.”

He looks at the dark road, the lights from other passing cars illuminating his face. “Still, I would’ve made time for you.” He laughs quietly. “Out of all my children, you were by far the easiest.”

My children…. I never thought he considered me his. I’m trying not to be insulted. “Easiest and cheapest. It’s not like you paid for anything.”

The car screeches to a halt at a stop light. “What do you mean? I gave your mother three thousand dollars a month for the three of you for dance classes, baseball and child support for you, since we had joint custody. ”

I pinch my lips remembering the ways Dad scraped by, between paying his staff and paying for my food. And extra money would’ve been life changing for us. Hell, I went back through the finances after he died and nothing. “Sorry, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ve never received any money from you, sir.”

He shakes his head, “I left you a prepaid credit card on your desk at the start of every summer with a thousand dollars on it.”

“I believe you think you did, but I didn’t get anything when I was a kid, or when I came to visit.”

First the journal, now the money. What else was stolen?

Richard leans his head back against the headrest and exhales several times before the person behind us honks and the car lurches forward. We return to our awkward silence until he pulls into the parking lot.

I point to my car and get an approval grunt. “Congrats on your East Coast Artist of the Year Award.”

“Um, thanks. I didn’t know you kept track of that stuff.”

“I’m watching over all my kids, even the shitty one.” He laughs a little and I’m not sure which one he’s talking about. “Adam steals your women and ruins them.”

Not in ten million lifetimes did I expect those words. “What?”

“First your mom, then Waverly.” Adam was her golden son, I was the forgotten one, but wait?

My throat dries. “You knew about Waverly and me?”

He gives a little shrug. “You two were a nice fit. Hell, the only time I saw you smile was when she was around. And she was only sad when summer ended and you left.”

He pulls into a parking spot at the bar. I’m about to tell him thanks for the ride but he speaks at the same time. “Why didn’t you say something about the money?”

My hand drops from the door as I shift my weight and meet his gaze. “Why would I assume you were giving me money to begin with?”

“Because I gave money to everyone. Why did you assume you wouldn’t be included?”

I shrug, “Because I’m not yours.”

He drags his hand down his face, ironing out the wrinkles, and for a second, he’s a younger version of him. “Jesus. You lived in my home for two months a year, of course you were mine. I signed every birthday and Christmas card. You got those, right?”

“Sure.”

He exhales. “And they had cash in them, right?”

I only remember empty cards with signatures. My silence gives him the answer he needs.

He groans a low, “Fuck….” and rests his head on the steering wheel.

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