Page 1 of Sins and Secrets

Prologue

5 years ago:

Waverly

Chaos erupts in the kitchen. Angie opens the microwave and pulls the flaming bag of popcorn out with a pair of tongs. I’m yanking the back door open to air out the kitchen, but my best friend takes this as a sign to throw the fireball out on the deck. Before I can follow the flaming snack outside and stamp out the inferno, Lukas pushes me out of the way and steps on it.

He turns on me, his eyes burning hotter than the charred popcorn. “You’re not wearing shoes.”

Oh. He’s right.

Lukas squares his shoulders once the final ember dies. “As I was saying, this is my last trip here.”

I’m a whirlpool of emotions, swirling between sadness over the end of an era, like my childhood is over, to sorrow this moment was ruined. I knew he wouldn’t return this summer. We talked about it at his dad’s funeral. I was the only one who attended.

Adam sneers, “Good. You weren’t a part of this family to begin with.”

“God, Adam, why do you have to be such a dick?” Angie snaps at her twin before turning her attention to her half brother. “I’m sorry to see you go, but it’s the right decision.” She squeezes him in a tight hug, and whispers, “I love you,” in his ear.

If Adam’s verbal attack hurt Lukas, Angie stitched his wounds back together. “I know.” Lukas dips his head, not raising his eyes from the floor.

Richard, Adam and Angie’s father, clears his throat, clearly uncomfortable at the show of affection. “Travel safe.” He nods at Lukas, turns on his heels, and walks away.

Carol, the mother of her trio—Adam, Angie, and Lukas—leaks crocodile tears as she hugs her oldest child.

Lukas knows better than to fall for this Oscar-worthy performance. His back stiffens, and he rolls his eyes and pats her back while leaving as much socially acceptable space as possible. We follow him to the front door, where he hitches his bag over his shoulder. He hesitates when I step forward and give him a hug. There’s so much I want to tell him. I got into Washington University for grad school. No more hiding, we can finally be free.

“Waverly, I left something on my desk for you,” he says, only for me. “Everything you need to know is there.”

I watch him walk to the cab. I offered to drive him, but he said he wanted to do this alone. Because of course he did. He hates flying and probably doesn’t want me to see him stressed. He pauses, peeking over his shoulder before sliding into the back seat. Is he checking to see who’s watching him leave forever? Is he disappointed it’s only me?

Once Lukas leaves, Angie and I clean up. In typical Adam fashion, he bails to spend an hour in the bathroom. Between spraying the curtains with air freshener and cleaning the counters, I check my phone at least four times for some sort of goodbye text, but I’m not surprised when I don’t see one. He normally texts when he’s at the gate and he can finally breathe a little. I guess I’m just more hopeful today.

Carol gives me a smile. “Thank you, sweetie, for all your work.”

It’s a weird thing to say, but this house has been my second home. I’m here all the time, more so since my cousin ran away. Every weekend for the last twelve years, I lived here. Why wouldn’t I help out?

Now that the pandemonium is over, Lukas already forgotten by the rest of the family, I head into the guest room. Three seasons of the year, I slept in this bed over the weekends. In summer, it belonged to Lukas.

His cologne still lingers in the air.

The desk is old, like from the eighties. Dents pepper the edges, and a pink splatter of nail polish Angie spilled seven years ago creates a bit of a bullseye effect in the center of it.

My brow furrows and I look around in confusion. I’m sure I’m missing something.

I search the drawers. All empty. The long drawer in the front holds the only clue—a lone piece of paper, the ink fresh with today’s date.

I turn it over again and again, searching for whatever Lukas was talking about.

A receipt? Trash?

I raise my head to the heavens as my heartbreak bubbles up in my throat. I pace around the room with my hands on my hips, my eyes firmly shut, breathing heavily through my nose. Because if I open my mouth, traitorous sobs will escape like a prison gang.

I gave him my heart and body for six summers, and all he gives me in return is this?

Angie stands in the doorway. “What are you doing here?”

“I’ve got to go.”

---