“It's not...” Sadness invaded Joaquin's chocolate-brown eyes as he made efforts to find the right words. “I...an arranged marriage is out of the question, and most of the respectable Mafia families already banned them. And even if I would be in favor of it, Mister MacNamara would never agree with this kind of union. I would have to kill him first.”
“Then this discussion doesn't have an object,” Soames replied in a much colder tone than he intended. “Now, if you excuse me...”
“I intend to court Cian properly. I want to discover him bit by bit to find out what his dreams and aspirations are so I can fully support him. But, before doing all these things, I need your blessing as Cian's best, most trusted friend.” Joaquin spoke in a passionate voice, a dreamy expression replacing the sadness from earlier.
“Very well. If you care so much about it, I'll give you my permission, blessing, or whatever you like to call it. Court Cian, make him fall in love with you, get engaged, then get married. But if you even breathe wrong in his direction and make him shed a single tear, I'll come after you.” Soames's voice was low, filled with determination, the expression on his face hard to decipher.
“You...” Joaquin stared at the guard, realization hitting him like a sucker punch. “You are in love with Cian, aren't you? Does he...did the two of you...did you let him know about your feelings for him?”
“Yes, I love Cian. No, I didn't tell him about that, and I don't intend to. What's the point? I’m down here, and you are up there. Who do you think he would choose, especially in these troubled times?”In an effort to keep the pain away from his voice, Soames's body became tense like a bow ready to release the arrow.
“I think Cian would choose the one he has feelings for,” Joaquin calmly answered. “That's why you have to talk to him. Keeping silent about what you feel for him won't do any good to either of you. I want to win his heart, of course, but I want to do it in a fair and honorable way.”
“You still don't get it, do you?” Soames shook his head and let out a huff. “You have a loving mother, grandfather, uncle, aunt, and cousin who love and support you, along with a name, a reputation, and a fortune. Somewhere, I have a family who didn't want me, and the one who wanted me is gone. I have nothing to offer to Cian except my heart and my life. This wasn't fair from the start.”
“A heart capable of love, dedication, generosity, and sacrifice makes more than all the riches and powers in the world.” Joaquin took Soames's hands in his, boring his chocolate-brown eyes into the guard's hazel ones. “Please, talk to Cian. I...I'm asking you this like a personal favor. Then, let me know what he says.”
There was something in Joaquin's voice, a mix of pleading and despair, that tugged at the chords of Soames's heart. “Very well. I'll do that.” He spoke in a very soft voice. “Now, I really have to go back to work. One of the other guys has something to take care of, and I have to cover his perimeter, too.”
Joaquin nodded and took a few steps in the administrative building's direction, but suddenly changed his mind. Turning around, he went next to Soames and hugged him, taking him by surprise. The guard let out a small gasp because the hug had a certain warmth and even affection. It was more than a formal gesture.
At the beginning, Soames didn't know how to react, thinking that hugging him was Joaquin's way of reaffirming his support for him, but, when the man's arms tightened around him, he knew he had to do something. Putting his own arms around Joaquin's waist, Soames pulled him closer and rocked him back and forth, running his flat palm over the other one's back.
They stayed like that for a few seconds, then the young don-to-be disentangled from the embrace, thanked the guard, wished him good luck, and headed to the administrative building. A few minutes later, Soames saw someone exiting from the same building and walking straight to him. As the person got closer, the guard recognized Cian, and his heart started to beat a little bit faster.
Soon, the blond boy was mere inches away from Soames, and the man could see the smile brightening his face and making his magnificent, turquoise eyes shine incandescently. The guard wondered if Cian was smiling because he met Joaquin on his way out of the administrative building, and if so, what did the other man tell him to get that reaction.
“Hello, my friend. How are you today? Sorry for being so late, but I met a kid on my way to you, and I had to calm him down a bit. The poor soul was very scared and hungry...He made me really, really sad.” Cian's shoulders slumped, the smile gone.
“Do you want us to talk about this?” Soames moved closer and put his arms around the young blond man, pulling him in a warm hug and cradling him the same way he did to Joaquin minutes earlier. “Who was the kid and what or who scared him?”
“His name is Evon, and he only came here yesterday.” Cian paused a little, inhaling sharply. “I can't tell you more for now, but this boy's father can put an end to this stupid street war. However, it will take a lot of time to gain Evon's trust and make him meet his dad, who's desperately searching for him.”
“Like always, I'd be happy to help you in any way I can.” Soames smiled reassuringly, still holding Cian tight in his arms. “You can bring him here, introduce us to each other, or simply tell him to come looking for me every time he feels lonely, sad, or simply feels the need for some company.”
“Thank you, Soames. You are such a good friend, like always.” Cian's voice and his turquoise eyes are filled with gratitude and innocence, the shy smile of the MacNamara men playing on his pink lips. “You were, and still are, always there whenever I need advice, encouragement, someone to celebrate with me, or a shoulder to cry on.”
“Well, I...I saw you were lonelier than your twin brother, then I found out you lost your mother, and before I knew it...” Soames abruptly stopped, intrigued by the look on Cian's face, a mix of affection and amusement. “Did I say something wrong?”
”No.” The small smile on Ardan’s son's face got wider. “You blushed. I've never seen you blushing before. You're kind of cute. Most of the time you are...good looking, handsome, beautiful, all kinds of wonderful things. Sometimes you are sad, and then I find myself wanting to hug you like this and never let you go.” Cian put his head on Soames's shoulder, letting out a small, content sigh.
“No one called me cute, you know, not as an adult, anyway. The old women in my adoptive family used to do that a lot when I was a child, though.” Soames closed his eyes, inhaling the younger man's scent. “I could stay like this forever because I feel the same about you. I just want to hold you to the end of time. I love you, Cian.”
“I love you, too, Soames. Every night, I fall asleep thinking of you, our talks playing on repeat in my head. Every morning, I wake up smiling and can't wait to see you and talk to you again. Sorry it took me so long to realize it, but I really, really love you.”
It was easy. Cian smiled against Soames's shoulder, the man's breath fanning on his neck and making him sigh in contentment, eyes closed. Pater is very wise. If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't have had the courage to express my feelings, he thought. For the first time in the four years since he came to live with Ardan, Cian didn't perceive him as the intangible superhero. The man was his father, warm, caring, and understanding.
Soames still couldn't believe the one he considered his soulmate just confessed his love for him and was right there in his arms. The guard opened his eyes and blinked a few times, half-convinced he was dreaming, but the image didn't disappear; Cian was there every time he opened his eyes.
Suddenly, Soames felt a pang in his chest, and it came as a surprise. That was supposed to be a happy moment, but the happiness wasn't complete. Joaquin. The name of the Fenelli family's boss-to-be came into the guard's mind, making him realize where the tinge of pain in his heart came from. Life is damn unfair sometimes, he sighed internally.
“I ran into Joaquin earlier.” Cian slowly disentangled from the embrace, his singsong voice pulling Soames from his thoughts. “He looked kind of sad, but when I asked him, he said it was nothing.” The blond inhaled sharply, then continued in a somehow hesitant voice. “I like him a lot.”
”I like him, too. He's a man of honor and integrity, just like everyone says. Joaquin Montemayor-Fenelli is also a sensible, caring, and affectionate man, and a great friend.” A smile formed on Soames' lips when he said the last words.
“He deserves to be happy. What about the two of us playing the matchmakers for him? I don't know why, but I have this feeling Joaquin's soulmate is here at The Base, waiting to be noticed. Some people, even the talkative ones, can have a very hard time when it comes to expressing their deepest feelings. I'm the best example.,” Cian grinned cutely.
“I agree with the part about shy people encountering difficulties with expressing their feelings, but I'd say we shouldn't act hastily. Fates have their own ways of making things happen. We better not interfere,” Soames said, hope and melancholy mixed in his voice.