Page 14 of More Than A Feeling

I hated it when her eyes filled with tears.

"Are you not in love with me?" she asked.

My heart broke for her. "I don't know. You're my friend and family. You're the woman I'm closest to after my mother."

She lifted my hand and kissed my knuckles. Nothing. It did nothing to me to have her mouth on my skin. In contrast, Fleur just had to look at me, and my dick would be hard enough to pound nails.

I found Sabine attractive, but almost in a theoretical way. She was traffic-stopping beautiful. You couldn't look away from her beauty. But in practice, I didn't feel sexual attraction for her. Had I ever? Maybe once in a while, if I were honest. I spent a lot of time with Sabine. She'd touch me, hug me, lie down with me. I was a man, and if a half-naked woman was around me, my dick would respond. But it wasn't doing so now as she pleaded with me to love her. Sabine's perfect face did nothing for my cock. But, I had to just think about Fleur,and there we go; my blood went south in a big hurry.

I was all kinds of an asshole, but I'd not fuck a woman while thinking of another. No way would I be with Sabine while I wanted Fleur.

I wanted Fleur! I still wanted her. Bloody fucking hell!

"Let me make this easy for you," Sabine said, her lips brushing the back of my hand as she spoke. "I’ve fallen in love with you. I didn’t realize it until I… until I saw you with Fleur. It hit me so hard, Callum. I’ll always love Seamus—you know that. But I think it’s time for me to live again. To love again."

"Are you sure you're not just jealous of Fleur?" I asked.

I'd accused Fleur of being envious of Sabine, but right now, I wondered if the other way around was also true. The sisters didn't get along, period. Maybe there were bad feelings from both sides, not just from Fleur toward Sabine.

A titter escaped Sabine. I didn't like the sound of it. There was something malicious about it. It didn't suit the elegant woman I knew. I stiffened, not keen to hear what she would say next because it would be unpleasant; I was certain of it.

Sabine did not disappoint.

"Why on earth would I be jealous of Fleur?"

Because she's fucking awesome?

"Just because you had sex with her doesn't mean anything to me, Callum. I doubt she was any good. I know her track record. She can't keep a boyfriend, and between that loser job of hers—"

"She gets paid very well for working in a senior position in a highly successful software company." I had no idea why I felt the need to defend Fleur, but there it was.

Sabine waved a hand. "What do you see when you look at me?"

Right now? Darling, I don't think you want to know.

"Get to your point," I suggested, low on patience.

"Fleur is not in my league and definitely out of yours. Just because you went slumming for a while doesn't make mejealous. Probably not the first time or last. Seamus had his flings too and—"

"What?" I knew my brother, and no fucking way would he have cheated on his wife.

She froze as she realized what she said. "I mean, before we were married."

She was backtracking. I knew Sabine, maybe better than I thought I did—because I was anticipating her eyes to fill with tears to avoid discussing Seamus further, andbam, they just did.

"I miss him so much."

I didn't believe her. In the past two years, since I'd gotten close to Sabine after Seamus passed, I'd never doubted her—but now, I just wasn't sure. The way she talked about Fleur made me uneasy.

"I know. Sabine, I talked to your father, and he said that he has never supported Fleur financially. You mentioned that—"

"Can we stop talking about Fleur?" Tears streamed down her face. "I'm really trying here, Callum, to keep it together. I love you. I'm in love with you and I know you love me too. You just need to accept that Seamus wouldn't mind us being together. In fact, I know he'd want this for us."

I had never been irritated by Sabine until now. This was the first time that I didn't want to be patient with her. I wanted to shake her and understand why the fuck she'd lied about Fleur, because she fucking had. What else was she lying about? An unpleasant feeling slithered inside me—guilt and common sense warred against each other.

I couldn't and wouldn't let Seamus down, but Fleur was nothing like what her sister and parents made her sound like. She wasn't selfish. Her friends had rallied around her the minute I'd fucked up. Did Sabine have friends like that? She had me, but I was there because she was Seamus's wife, and sure, I'd become fond of her, but….

"Callum? Are you even listening to me?"

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