Page 27 of ForeverMN

“This thing in New York is going to be huge. It’s messy. We’re going in half blind already and, I can’t lie, it’s going to be time consuming. I won’t be around much,” he continues, his eyes fall to the ground.

“Don’t you dare give me the out of sight, out of mind bullshit, Ci,” I huff, and my hands find my hips.

His lips quirk in a smile, the first one I’ve seen from him in so long that it makes my heart pinch. “I wasn’t going to say that. We’ll be apart for a while, and maybe it will be good for us both to think, and see what we really want. No matter what, Say, I always want the best for you.”

Tears sting my eyes. The ugly ones, the big fat messy kind that are going to carry the pieces of my heart with them. I want to yell at Ciaran how much I want him. That I need him. I love him so much, and I wish I had never planted seeds of doubt in his mind. Now isn’t the right time. He’s getting ready to go somewhere dangerous. My family, some of the people I hold dearest, are getting ready for a battle. More than anything else,even if it hurts, even if I leave here with my heart in shambles, I need Ciaran to be safe. He needs to be thinking clearly, and not worrying about me.

I find it in myself to straighten my spine, and blink the tears away. I need to be strong for him, for us, for Rogue. My lips smile softly, and I nod. His shoulders relax just a bit, before I step into him. My hands rest against his chest, feeling the beat of his heart against my palm before raising on my tip-toes and touching his lips softly with my own.

“Be safe, Ci. I’ll be waiting.”

Ciaran

This whole plot is a giant disaster. Even with the intel from Nash, Ollie, and Miles at GO, and with as much information as Reed has been able to get, there still seem to be pieces missing. I’ve been in New York for a month now, longer than I ever wanted to be, and it feels like we’re no closer to answers than we were two months ago. It’s an endless cycle.

MADAM B.

The Chemist.

Missing people.

Memories vanishing.

The Surgeon.

Each clue was just as ominous as the next, and each lead was a dead end. Literally. Our last contact with a possible informant led to finding their body twenty-six hours later. Someone knows we’re looking for answers, and they’re quick to cover their tracks. The only good news is that no one has connected our activity to Rogue, or Ghost Operatives. Yet anyway. Since I’ve been gone, Silas and Kai have joined me, and each time reporting the same information that things are well and safe in Minnesota.

While it’s good to hear, I can’t help but think we’re only at the calm before the storm. Some of the things from this case are giving me the same feeling from five years ago when our security was breached and we ended up wiping out the whole town tokeep it safe. I’ve been having dreams about it. And at the end of each dream I see Saylor reaching for me, while blood trickles from her mouth.

I haven’t spoken to Saylor since she walked out of Matt’s house after kissing me goodbye. I didn’t know what to say to her to make her feel better. Every time I think I have a solution for us, I end up pushing us further apart. I told her to take time and think about what she wants. And I meant it. Whatever she wants when this is over, I’ll give it to her. My heart might break, and I might be alone for the rest of my life, but at least Saylor will have had her time, had her space, and she will be happy again someday.

Just looking around the city reminds me of her. This is where she came from. Where she spent seventeen years of her life before being uprooted to my home town. This is where she breathed and dreamed. This is where I chased her down, and asked her to come with me, when we were kids. Despite our rocky beginning, I always wanted her. Maybe it was selfish to ask her to change her whole life for me back then, but I’ll never forget the way her eyes found mine when she arrived back with Matt at our home. And even a year later when we had to be back here for our last mission, when that fuck-face Nash stabbed me, she still chose me. She chose Rogue over and over. It has to be a sign, right? Except this time I might have pushed too far.

One last time my eyes roam over the city lights and skyline. It’s beautiful. The city really is beautiful, from a distance. I can’t wait to put this image in my rearview mirror. At this point I need something lucky, something big to happen, to break this case wide open. Who is the string puller of the Surgeon who uses MADAM B to hurt innocent people? And who is the Chemist who created the drug? How did a classified military project end up twisted in this mess? The pieces want to put themselves together for me, but I can’t focus enough to see it. My gut istelling me it’s because of this city. The origins come from right here.

My burner phone vibrates. It’s an incoming call from Reed. Anxiously, I hit the talk button.

“What do you have for me?”

I can hear him typing on his computer. “Six years ago in New York, a man provided a stimulation drug at a party held by Aimsworth’s family. The man claimed that there wouldn’t be any danger because with both parties taking it, neither would remember the indiscretion. A few couples swapped partners for the night, and the next day they didn’t remember anything about their night. One year later the same stimulation drug reappeared with new side effects. Stronger, more potent. The Madam is what it was dubbed, and instead of before, it was given after a situation occurred.”

“So the Chemist was dealing out MADAM B at these parties. Or trying to,” I start putting the time line together. “This was when we first became involved.”

“Yes. You aren’t going to like this next part. The Chemist was last approached by someone on the black market who was looking for a particular substance to go along with his particular skill set. He sold bodies, alive, or deceased, or parts, and used MADAM B on his victims after, if they lived, so they didn’t remember.” Reed goes on to explain.

“Why after? Wouldn’t he want them out for whatever the fuck he was doing?”

“He wanted the chase and the thrill,” Mila pipes in, her voice oddly cheery. “It was part of his calling card.”

“Lovely.” I respond, my insides twisting. “So where is the Surgeon now?”

“He was imploded, along with all the other individuals, in the party that was taken out by Rogue,” Reed informs me.

My stomach falls along with all the hopes I had that we were finally getting ahead. “So the Surgeon is no more.”

“No,” Mila jumps in again, “But his apprentice is very much alive. I think that is who is working with the Chemist now. Some of the same activity, only cleaner, more precise, and limited in blood and gore. The survivors now are almost being treated like escorts. When they turn up again, they know nothing. There are fewer casualties, and less blood.”

I swipe a hand over my face. “Anything in particular I should be looking for?”