Page 25 of A Conflict of Interest

“Nah… I’m just hung up right now, but I definitely like sucking guys off in general.”

“And eating girls out doesn’t mean the same thing?”

Huh. I guess maybe it did. That was weird. I finished off my coffee, setting it back down on the saucer, and I said, “Hey, Neil—”

“Noah.”

“Thanks. For this. I appreciate it. I’m gonna ask your buddy if I can buy that nutcracker off of them. Kelcey would love it.”

“I’ll back you up. It’ll make a fun story for both of us.”

In the end, the guy at the register was so confused he eventually just offered to let me take the nutcracker, and I argued thatno,it wouldn’t make a good gift then, and we haggled until I handed over ten dollars for the nutcracker, and I got back to my apartment with a weird kind of lightness about me that I wasn’t used to, and I found myself calling Anna out of nowhere. She picked up on the second ring.

“I’m bisexual,” I said, and Grandma’s voice came down the line.

“I know that. All those crude texts you sent me about Kelcey were plenty to figure that out, that poor girl.”

“Ah, shit, sorry, Gram. Meant to call Anna.”

She muttered something before she hung up, and I called Anna, properly this time. It almost went to voicemail with her before she picked up, sounding harried.

“God, what’d you do?” she said.

“I’m bisexual.”

She paused. “Uh…” I heard the gears turning in her head before her tone changed, and I could hear her moving around, settling down somewhere with a heavy sigh, the sound of her changing gears. “Okay. All right… um. Thank you for telling me. I support you.”

I sat further back in the couch, pulling my knees up into my chest, my heart beating faster than it had any right to, and I didn’t think it was from the coffee. “I’m pretty sure I was in love with Kelcey. And I think I still am.”

“You really like getting shoved into a tree, huh?”

I guess actually I couldn’t really explain how Kelcey was so central to all of my thoughts again now. Anna would murder me if she found out what I was doing with Kelcey. “Yeah, I, uh… I just went out with some guy from an app and I just sat there talking about Kelcey. And I insisted he not worry about me being hung up on her and told him to come back to my place and shove his dick down my throat—”

“I don’t want to hear the details, Veronica—”

“—and once he finally agreed to do it, I felt likeewand I wanted to run away and go watch Love Island with Kelcey instead.”

She sighed. “You really have got it bad.”

“I mean, don’t get me wrong, I want her to sit on my face too—”

“Ew—Veronica—”

“What?I know full well how much you like Lucy sitting on your face—”

“Veronica, you’re making it worse.”

“—but I also just want tobewith her and be… in love with her. I want to be her girlfriend. I want her to be my girlfriend.”

She sighed, harder this time. “Do you… want me to talk to her? Tell her how much you actually seem to mean it this time and convince her to give you a chance? Because trust me, I’m hesitant to offer you that, but you seem to… mean it.”

“Uh…” I cleared my throat awkwardly. “Not… yet. I still have to, uh… figure some stuff out first.”

“Some stufflike what, Veronica?” she said, a dangerous edge to her voice. Uh-oh. Couldn’t let her cotton on. Had to throw her off.

“I’m hosting a swinger’s party at my place tomorrow night—”

“Ew—god—forget I asked. I don’t want to know. Sure, just… just let me know. Once you’re ready to face your feelings. I swear to god, Veronica…”

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