Page 159 of On the Double

“Ouch,” FNG said from behind me. I hadn’t even been aware they’d come up to the house with me. “Looks like we drove out here for nothing.”

“I’m not giving up that easily.” I slammed my fist against the door until she opened it again. Her face twisted in anger as she waited for me to speak. “We need to talk.”

Again, the door slammed in my face. Fucking hell, she didn’t even want to talk to me? Then, her speakers blasted music, essentially cutting off any attempt of me speaking to her.

“Is that…Benson Boone?” FNG asked.

“What?”

Dash nodded. “Apropos.”

“What?” I snapped.

“Oh, it’s this song about how the girl broke this guy’s heart and blames all her problems on her mental state. And he’s tired of hearing her excuses, so he tells her she can cry. Hence, the title of the song,Cry. Only, in this scenario, she’s the guy and you’re the girl with all the problems.” He winced. “Sorry, man.”

I rolled my eyes and pounded on the door again, but she just cranked up the music.

“This is fucking ridiculous,” I muttered. “I’m here to make things right. Why doesn’t she see that?”

“Well,” Dash said calmly. “I would assume it’s because she doesn’t want to hear your excuses. And she wants you to cry. Have you tried that?”

“If you don’t have something helpful to say, shut the fuck up.” Istormed over to the door again and slammed my fist against the thick wood, but she couldn’t hear me over the music. “Fuck this.”

I stomped down the steps, nearly slipping on the ice, and stalked around to the back of the house. If she wasn’t going to let me in, I’d just break the damn door down. By the time I reached the back steps, I had calmed down enough not to actually kick in the door. Instead, I picked the lock and let myself in. I followed the sound of the music until I reached the kitchen. But I didn’t get much further than that because her little attack cat had me cornered and was hissing at me, stretching his claws out.

“Stop,” I hissed, trying to flick the cat off my leg as he tried to climb it.

I flicked a little too hard and the cat went flying, hitting the wall with a thud. I winced as he scrambled to his feet and ran away. At least that was one problem out of the way.

I slowly walked closer, staring at her beautiful figure. From where I stood, I could see her watching out the window, probably waiting to see what I would do.

“Looking for me?”

She gasped, spinning around at the sound of my voice. “What are you doing here?”

“I came for you.”

She pursed her lips, thrusting her hands on her hips defiantly. “Well, too bad. I’m not going anywhere with you.”

“Then I’ll stay here.”

“No, you won’t. You shouldn’t even be here. How did you find me?”

“Your conspirator finally clued me in,” I bit out. I was pissed as hell that she left, but I understood why. I walked over to the stereo and turned off the music. Now that the sound was off, I could hear her heavy breathing. She was terrified to have me here. Not because she was afraid of me, but because I might hurt her again. I could see that now, and I hated that I hurt her so much.

“I hurt you,” I said bluntly. “I said horrible things to you when you were already scared. I blamed you for things that were just as much my fault, if not more.” I shook my head as I recalled my hateful words. “It was just as much my responsibility to take care of you, and instead of dealing with your pregnancy calmly, I spewed hateful words at you. And I can never forgive myself for that.”

She didn’t say a word. In fact, she only watched me warily.

“I’m so fucking sorry, Harper. For everything. For not reacting the way I should have. For making what should have been a happy moment so fucking terrible. But most of all, for not realizing the whole time we were together that I love you, and I was a fool to not see that you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. It took you walking out on me to realize all that I was missing, and it should never have come to that.”

I stepped toward her, but she backed up a step, still desperate to get away from me.

“I know you can’t forgive me right away. But I’m hoping one day, you’ll look at me the way you used to.” I moved one foot at a time, taking it slow so I didn’t scare her off. I held out my hand like I would to a frightened kitten and slowly slid my hand over her growing belly. I hadn’t realized I was holding my breath until that very moment. I exhaled sharply, getting down on my knees as I pressed the other hand to her stomach.

It was real. There was a baby in there, and it was a product of the two of us. I leaned forward and pressed my lips to her stomach, then rested my forehead against it, feeling the smallest bump against my head. I jerked my gaze up to meet hers and nearly started crying.

“Was that…”

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