Page 119 of Just This Once

He dropped his hands and gaped at me. “What do you mean, what do you do? Nothing! It’s already done. Just… Go forth and never do something stupid like that again.”

“But—” When he furrowed his brow into a deep scowl, I faltered, only to rush my words a moment later. “I can’t stop thinking about her. I’m seriously not sure if I can stay away much longer.”

His lips parted as he stared at me, clearly unable to believe what he was hearing.

Then he shut his mouth before biting out, “Then try harder.”

“Eisner,” I pleaded, shaking my head. “You don’t understand.”

“Oh, I understand plenty.” He narrowed his eyes in frank disapproval. “It felt thrilling and naughty and exciting to do something forbidden and wrong. So you built the whole memory up in your head that she was just thisamazinglay. Except she wasn’t. She’s only one more woman you’ve slept with. Like all the rest of them.”

“But what if she wasn’t?” I tried.

Thane snorted. “Believe me, she was.”

When I just looked at him, unable to buy that, he gripped my arm. “Hey, as soon as you sleep with someone else, you’ll realize I’m right, okay?”

I shook my head. “That’s not how you got over Nova.”

Eyes widening in warning, he lifted a finger to hush me before he glanced toward the opening of the kitchen. “First of all,shut up,” he hissed. “And secondly, of course, it’s not. ButI’m not you. Sex is serious for me. It’s affection and relationships and monogamy. For you, it’s just some casual exchange with a near stranger whose body you borrowed for a few minutes. It’smeaningless.”

I bristled. Not because he was wrong—meaningless was usually exactly what sex was for me—but because being with Hope had been anythingbutminor.

So when I merely scowled at him with my hands fisted at my sides, trying with everything I had not to attack him for degrading her, he read my expression and sighed. “Will you just trust me on this? Find someone else, sleep withher, and this will all be out of your system.”

My jaw tightened, not warming to the idea.

“Jesus, Ohrley,” he muttered. “The girl isoff-limits. Move on and forget about her.”

I still didn’t answer because I wanted Hope again. I craved a repeat of our weekend more than I could remember craving anything.

And Thane could read the yearning on my face.

With a whispered curse, he shook his head. “You’re not listening to a damn thing I’m saying right now, are you?”

“I’mtryingto! But she?—”

She was Hope.

“Just—” He lifted a hand to block my stubbornness, but he didn’t get to continue his lecture.

His dad popped his head into the room, calling, “Hey, you two, gossip later. The ladies in here are gettin’ hungry.”

And that was as close as I could come to confessing what I’d done.

From there on out, the evening progressed with all its focus on Christine and the Eisners.

Only once did I let my mind stray toward Hope when I was checking a message from a client. My thumb swiped into my appto see where my Lucid Air was out of habit before I pocketed the phone again.

But when I saw that she was at my restaurant, I smirked in pleasure. I only wished I could’ve been there to see her face when she learned I’d put her on my VIP list.

“So, Parker,” Christine said smoothly, gaining my attention as she set down her glass of water. “What do you do for a living?”

30

HOPE

Igot not one but two tattoos on Friday, a plain number four in Roman numerals on the insides of both of my feet just under my ankles to commemorate the completion of number four on my bucket list.

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