Page 5 of Blame It On The Reindeer

“Right. Sorry. I’m not sure what I’m trying to say. Eating someone’s cookie isn’t gross. It’s actually a very natural thing to do. Though, I don’t know why we call it a cookie because it’s not like it’s shaped like one. And I don’t know about you, but I would be worried if it had little chocolate chips—like, what is that?” I laughed nervously, swallowing the rest of my words with a loud gulp when I noticed the unamused smile on his face. “Back to the reason why I’m here... I brought you cookies and hoped that we could sit down and talk for a few minutes.”

He studied me so intently that I felt like I was on display. My body flushed as a wave of heat washed over it while his eyes leisurely roamed over my body at a painstakingly slow speed.

“How did you end up stuck to my fence post?”

“Oh. That.” I laughed awkwardly again, my anxiety at its full peak now. “Well. I um. I was just checking something.”

I pulled my lower lip in between my teeth to keep from continuing. The look he was giving me was fierce, and I would be lying if I said I wasn’t scared—and quite turned on—by it.

“Which was?”

I tried to straighten myself as best as I could while mustering up the courage to come clean.

“I came to check on the reindeer.”

“Why?”

“Because they’re my friends,” I scoffed, instantly insulted by his tone.

His eyebrow lifted on its own accord, questioning me.

“I’ve worked with your grandfather for years, and as the coordinator for Frosty Fest, it was my job to oversee everything—including the reindeer. I’ve spent a lot of time with them and built friendships.”

He lowered his head and shook it as if this was the most absurd thing he’d ever heard.

“What? Why is that so unbelievable to you?”

“Because animals don’t have friends. They’re not capable of the emotions required to have afriendship.”

“Uhhh, yeah, they do.” I scrunched my face up in disgust. “In fact, they’re probably better at it than you are, you old grumpy ass.”

My words slipped through my lips before I could stop them.

His head lifted slowly, a splash of humor seeming to light up his eyes before it vanished again.

“And how exactly did you get stuck to the fence post?” he asked, ignoring my comment. “Did you attach yourself to it as a way of protest or something? Like one of those tree-loving people who chain themselves to a tree to keep it from being cut down?”

“No, Mr. Smart Ass. I didn’t purposely attach myself to your fence post. I was walking along the wall, trying to get a better look, but I lost my balance. I tried to jump to keep from falling, but as luck would have it, I ended up right on top of the post. Thankfully it didn’t hit me in the ass on the way down because that would have hurt.” I shivered at the thought and then shivered again when I noticed the change in his eyes when I mentioned my ass.

“I seriously don’t understand how this happened.” He shook his head and walked around the post, studying each angle. “How did your jacket end up wrapped around it, and why didn’t you just unzip it?”

I rubbed my lips together, ignoring the numbness that was now taking over my toes.

“The jacket is too big for me. It’s my roommate’s. I was heading out the door when I realized I had left mine at work, so I just grabbed it from the hook and left. When I jumped, I must have gotten enough air for it to puff up the jacket, creating the perfect pocket for the post to slide into.”

He stepped in front of me and stopped, looking me dead in the eye.

“I know. It sounds ridiculous. Trust me, I tried figuring out a way to free myself before you found me. No one is more embarrassed by this than me.”

“I don’t think anyone would ever believe me if I told them this happened,” he said, shaking his head as he pulled his cell phone out.

“What are you doing?”

“Getting a picture for proof. It would have been better if the cameras were up. Then I could have watched it happen, but this will have to do.”

“So you’re capturing me in the most humiliating moment of my life for your personal satisfaction? What are you going to do with it?”

“Haven’t decided yet.” He shrugged as if there were no sense of urgency as a blistering cold gust of wind whipped past us.

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