Page 117 of Hard Knot

"You don't know anything about me," I growl, the words escaping before I can stop them.

His laugh is soft but sharp.

"I know more than you think, Holmesovich. The silk isn't just for show, is it? It's a reminder. A punishment of something you endured and still haven’t fully healed from." He pauses, and I can feel the weight of his side gaze. "The question is: who are you really punishing? Yourself? Or everyone who dares to care about you?"

The words hit with devastating accuracy, each one finding its mark with surgical precision. My hand moves unconsciously to touch the silk covering my eyes — my shield, my prison, my self-imposed exile from a world that had taken everything from me.

"They're going to leave you," he says quietly. "Not because they want to, but because you're giving them no choice. Carter's already at his breaking point, and how can you blame him when I’m sure he’s dreamed of finally finding an Omega that meets every checked box, only for the man he considers a worthy enough friend try and fuck it up. Felix will follow if only to keep the pack from completely imploding. He may be the analytic type, using numbers and equations to understand the solution to any circumstance, but he isn’t blind or irresponsible. He knowswhat he wants, but he wants his leader’s permission to acquire what he desperately desires. And Elizabeth..."

He trails off, letting her name hang between us like a challenge.

"Elizabeth deserves someone who isn't afraid to claim her," I say, the words coming out rougher than intended. “Because that’s how it’s always been like in her world of chaos. Restraints. Denial. Obstacles left and right. She doesn’t need a knight in shining armor to steal her away from the circumstances she can never hide from. She wants a man who will stand by her side with bold acuity, so she can fight against those shackles knowing she'll have someone to catch her when she falls. That’s if she ever does fall.”

His words paint a truth I never allowed myself to think of, which makes me realize, that maybe I don’t have to be perfect to see her rise. Don’t need to hide in the shadows to watch her shine.

That maybe…I can be a part of her reign.

"We all have trauma, Holmes…and I’m sure Eli hides hers flawlessly because she’s had no choice…but it’s hard to hide what haunts you at every step of survival, and even harder when you’re alone doing it.” He takes a deep breath and lets it out. “I don’t know your story. No one does it seems, but don’t let whatever left hidden and permanent scars, stop you from obtaining a bond and connection you’ll never be able to acquire again when lost.”

He takes three steps forward and stops.

“I certainly won’t make that mistake twice.”

He’s affirmed that loud and clear.

“Where are you going,” I end up saying as I hear his next step.

“Someone has to make sure these administrative douches do what I requested in a timely manner. I’m sure they’re tryingto think of a way to get rid of me; to keep me from attending this shithole of a school, but I have all my ducks in a row, with countermeasures of course.

His confidence annoys me.

“Watch Eli for me,” he encourages. “You can actually try and be an average douche of an Alpha and do that much knowing Carter and Felix won’t see anything. I ensured the room used surveillance that was un-hackable. Give you a few hours of peace. Maybe even remove that blindfold and get some filtered air against your face.”

He begins to walk away, his trailing steps making me well aware of his departure.

“I’d be sweating all the time if I had to wear a blindfold. Try sunglasses once in a while. Probably look cooler.”

I want to argue with his commentary, but he’s already gone.

Allowing my shoulders to finally slump to release all the tension in them, I let out a sigh before I press my hand to my blindfold.

Why did I never think this shit was hot?

It’s almost amusing to acknowledge as I take the remaining steps needed to reach the door and slip inside. Closing it, I proceed to move the blindfold off, needing a few seconds to adjust before opening my good eye and locating Abercrombie first.

Almost on instinct, my gaze finds her in a mere second, watching her sleep as a cold towel is laid upon her forehead. I can tell from how flushed her usual porcelain skin is that she’s definitely heating up, which prompts me to reach the side of her bed.

I end up taking the towel and giving it another round of chilled water, laying it on her forehead. It ignites a sigh of relief as she stirs just slightly. She looks miserable, despite being unconscious — the sight makes me feel unease at her distress.

Stupid Alpha instincts.

Still, seeing her unwell doesn’t bring me the pleasure I originally expected.

I don’t like it…

With a sigh, I pull a chair and bring it to the side of the bed, lowering it into its firm comfort while allowing myself to admire her sleeping figure.

“Will you hurt me like that bitch did?” I ask as if she can hear me.

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