Page 53 of Odette's Vow

Of course, Hecuba was technically no longer a queen, already becoming a shell of the woman she once was. I noticed it as her shoulders curled in on themselves as Cassandra walked away. I recognised myself in her, how I was when we had been led away from my home.

That was what slavery took from you – your sense of self. I think I had expected it to be an immediate thing. That once youwere a slave, your lack of control would be a slap in the face every day. But it was more sinister than that; sneakier. There were no physical shackles. Odysseus had still given me the illusion of control in my life, and so each action I had taken had still felt like my own. Until the guilt that I had unwittingly chosen this life for myself churned in my gut.

But now, there was no guilt. Now there were just actions and consequences. A bargain to be struck with every decision.

I suddenly understood Odysseus a lot better.

When he had stumbled into the tent, after the killings, I waited for the guilt to come. I waited for that feeling, buried in my heart and clawing at my stomach since Lykas had died, to desperately rise to the surface once again.

But there was no pain, only calm.

So, I waited for Odysseus’ beration instead. That didn’t come either.

Then he’d decided in Hecuba’s favour, and something in my brain clicked. It wasn’t about what was right, or fair. It was about justification. You just had to be right, and to be rightyou just had to be on the winning side. That was how wars were won, histories were written. By those who wereright. Individual actions were no different.

I kept that thought in mind as we finally packed up and walked to the ships a day later, leaving Troy behind, this time once and for all.

I had never been on a boat before the Trojan Horse.

This time, as we boarded the twelve black ships with Odysseus’ remaining six hundred men, I wasn’t so nervous. Ahead of me, the men leered at Hecuba. I did not envy being the newest thing to keep their attention, though I certainly hadn’t attracted it, as sullen as I’d been. Hecuba, in contrast, made waves simply with her presence. Of course, word had spreadaround camp faster than we had boarded the ships of what she had done, what we had done, though no one paid me any mind.

Instead, they watched Hecuba sway through the shallow waters in her azure robes with a beaded belt. It was probably the last fine thing she had left. It draped across her svelte frame in a way that was tasteful but alluring, as all expensive garments were.

It wasn’t the right thing to wear.

The men reached out occasionally to stroke the fabric – and more – as they passed her, crude laughter following. Their touches were not enough to be considered brazen contact with Odysseus’ property, but enough to make her feel uncomfortable. I could tell by the way she tried to dodge their hands, even as her body swayed. Still, she kept her head down. She didn’t snap at them or swat them away like flies, as I expected her to. She just kept walking forward, her head bowed. Walking, walking, walking, all the way into the ocean.

I watched as the waves lapped at her hips, the turquoise of her dress turning a darker and darker blue, until she looked like she was rising from the ocean itself. When it came time to turn, to board the main black ship that Odysseus and myself would be on, to climb the ladder that would take her aboard, she kept walking.

Deeper and deeper into the ocean.

The men didn’t notice. She was a bit of fun, nothing to be concerned about. Their focus quickly shifted to the crates of spoils and valuables Odysseus was allowing them to take home to families they hadn’t seen in a decade. They jostled and barked orders at one another, struggling to load the heavy goods onto the ships without tipping into the surf.

Just before my queen waded further into the sea than was safe, the clouds above her parted with a crack, and sunlight poured through like a spear from the heavens. I watched as thelight hit the surface of the water and danced across it, blinding the men boarding and on the ship, as they squinted and shielded their eyes from the sudden brilliance. A few cried out, stumbling back as a heavy chest of plunder slipped from their grasp and crashed into the shallows, splintering wood and sending coins tumbling into the frothy waves.

“Get it! Before it’s lost!” came the frantic shouts, and men dove into the water, scrambling to collect what they could.

I didn’t know where Odysseus was, somewhere behind me I suspected, busy making sure all his men got aboard. For surely, if he saw what I saw, he would sprint into the crashing waves to stop her.

But he didn’t.

For amidst the chaos, it seemed no one but myself noticed Hecuba walking deeper, until she seemed a part of the sea itself. I did not say a word. I did not cry out, for I had known that feeling that now engulfed my queen. That absolute abyss where happiness could never exist again. She had done what she needed to do, her vengeance complete. Now, she needed peace. I would not be the one to rob her of it.

Instead, I continued to watch her walk. She must have carried something in between the folds of her dress, something to weigh her down, I considered. Rocks that she had probably found around the camp as the men were busy packing away. Because she continued sinking beneath the waves that hit her belly, then her breasts. Until, eventually, her shoulders and head were submerged beneath a wave … and I never saw her again.

It wasn’t until much later, when everyone was aboard and settled on the well-benched ships, that I watched as Odysseus looked around us.

Turning to me, he frowned. “Odette, where is Hecuba?”

“Dead.”

A hush fell amongst the men.

“Dead? What do you mean, dead?”

“She wandered into the ocean before we boarded the ships. Did you not see it?” I tried to keep my tone neutral, but some of my sarcasm seeped through and a few of the men sniggered.

Odysseus merely had to send them all a look and that quickly stopped.

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