Page 54 of Cry of the Firebird

"I-I remembered the boys," she stammered, and the old woman let her go. Anya got up and stumbled past her. Baba Zosia didn't try to stop her as she hurried out of the caravan. The camp blurred through her tears, and she ran for the forest.

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

Birch boughs slapped against Anya's arms and face as she ran further and further into the trees. Horror clawed at her throat, and she dry heaved but managed to keep her breakfast down.

Anya sat down on a fallen tree and put her head between her legs, her breaths coming in tight, panicked gasps, sweat breaking out over her skin.

You almost killed those boys. And she had sat back and smiled while she did it.

"You know running off is a bad idea right now," Trajan said, making her head jerk up. He looked at her tear-stained face and was crouched beside her in a blink. "Anya, what happened? Are you hurt?"

Anya shook her head and wiped the tears off her face. "I asked Baba Zosia to remove Eikki's memory spell."

Trajan swore in Greek. "Which incident did you see?"

"There's more than one?" she asked, her voice rising in panic.

"You're okay. Talk to me, Anya. What did you see?" Trajan replied, his voice growing soft.

"The boys at the lake. I almost murdered them, Trajan. I…I liked seeing them powerless," she admitted. Trajan moved to sit beside her, resting his elbows on his knees.

"I remember when that happened. It was the reason why Eikki decided to go through with his plan to take away your memories. I told him that he was overreacting, that you were young and hurt, and your magic had tried to protect you," he explained.

"I know what I felt, Trajan. I wanted to make them feel as humiliated as me," Anya argued. "Maybe Eikki was right to not teach me if I was willing to kill."

"Anya, you were afraid and alone. Those boys could've hurt you a lot more than what they did. You defended yourself. It was a lesson that the little bastards needed, in my opinion. I convinced Eikki to leave their fear of you in place, just so they never tried to mess with you again."

Trajan grinned sideways at her, making her heart trip. It prompted another fresh memory and surge of emotions; she'd had a massive crush on him at twelve.

"What's the matter? Your face just changed to horror and back again," he asked, his smile slipping.

"Nothing. I was only thinking about what other horrible things I did that I'm going to remember and freak out over," she lied.

"The lake was probably the incident that scared Eikki the most." Trajan's smile grew bigger. "Well, apart from when you were nine and told him you were going to marry me when you grew up."

Anya buried her head in her hands. "Shut up. I did not."

"You did. You were very vocal and insistent about it." He gently pulled her hands away from her burning face. "Eikki had a heart attack, but I thought it was cute."

"Well, can you blame me? You saw the village I grew up in. Any man with a full set of teeth is a prize," Anya said, making them both laugh.

Trajan was still holding her hand, and she didn't pull away.

"How about this, whenever you have a bad memory, you come to me to talk about it? I wasn't there for all of them, but it might help," he said, brushing his thumb over the top of her palm. "I was out of your life for a long time, but you can talk to me about anything, and I won't judge you. Don't let the memory of those boys make you doubt yourself. You weren't a murderer then, and you're not one now."

"Thanks, Trajan. I'd appreciate that," Anya replied. Her mouth went dry as his thumb circled against her skin again, the small touch sending a wave of goosebumps up her arm. His eyes were warm and golden, and as she looked at the curve of his lips, she couldn't help but think of them against hers.

"Trajan? About last night," she began, trying to summon her courage. "Thank you for being there for me and for giving me one last kiss. You didn't have to, and I don't want it to create any weirdness between us."

"Do you feel weird with me here right now?" he asked, his brows drawing together.

"No. But I thought maybe you would. Cerise told me that your kind doesn't mix with mortals because you could hurt them."

"Did she now?" Trajan said, frustration tinging his gentle tone. "It's true. I haven't 'mixed' with a mortal before, but I wouldn't have kissed you if I didn't want to."

"Oh, that's good then."

"I'm glad you think so." Trajan's small, pleased smile was back. Anya was filled with so many butterflies she was surprised they weren't bursting out of her bright red ears. Before she could reply, a sharp whistle cut through the trees.

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