Page 182 of The Mask Falling

It was the only thing I didn’t understand. Why he had allowed himself to fall so far into flesh-treachery. He must have reasoned that the more I opened my heart to him, the deeper he could drive the knife.

He had been right. Even now I knew the truth, the memory of that night made me ache for his touch again. He was a poltergeist, haunting me from wherever he was now, and his phantom hands still held me close, held me prisoner. I slid into a drowse, my cheek pressed into a cushion.

It was a long time before I heard the door. A figure entered my den and switched on a lamp.

“Flora.”

My eyelids scraped apart. Ducos was sitting on the bed, one eyebrow arched.

“You had better not be drunk again.” She gave me a sharp tap on the cheek. “What is the matter with you?”

“Fine,” I rasped.

“Yes, you look it.” Before I could object, she hoisted me into a sitting position. Knotted curls fell over my brow. “You need a shower. And a comb. And a clean shirt. When was the last time you ate?”

“Not sure.” The skin under my eyes was raw. “What day is it?”

“Tuesday. The twenty-fourth.” She felt my cheeks, my forehead. “Out with it, then.”

She needed to know. “My auxiliary,” I said. “He went to Scion. You and Stéphane should find new aliases.”

“Are you saying he has double-crossed you?”

I managed a small nod. “I don’t know how much he might have told them.”

Ducos kept her cool, but I could almost hear the gearwheels of her mind at work.

“I did not expect this.” She took something from the floor. “I found this behind the safe house in Rue Gît-le-Cœur. I assumed your auxiliary or Cordier had thrown it outside to keep it from Scion.”

My backpack. With leaden arms, I reached for it, then carefully undid the zip. Inside was everything I owned, including the ledger.

“He can’t have,” I said, too softly for her to hear.

Ducos moved to sit in a nearby chair. A belt rode high on her waist, and her trousers were turned up to show off heeled leather boots. I had never felt like more of a mess.

“You had feelings for him,” she said. I was silent. “It happens. In this line of work, we walk on the edge of a knife. If he softened that edge for you, you should not blame yourself. We have all trusted the wrong people at one point or another. Cordier, in particular, always looked for someone to dull the blade.” She breathed out. “She is gone. There was blood near the safe house, so we must presume her dead or captured. As for Stéphane, I have sent them to sub-network Figurine. This may be the end of Mannequin.”

Out came her silver case. She picked one of her trim cigarettes from it.

“I wondered who betrayed us,” she said. “Perhaps it was your auxiliary, after all. Or someone else.” She lit the cigarette with a snap. “For now, I will hold the fort alone. My work is important, and I have not spent thirteen years in Scion to give up now. We can rebuild.”

“Alone.” I managed a tired smile. “I’m out, then.”

“Yes,” she said flatly. “You burned down a seventeenth-century palace. You are out.”

“Oh, that. I almost forgot.”

“Command agreed with my conclusion that you are not well-suited to the role of intelligence officer. You are too personally invested in the fight against Scion. Consequently, your access to our safe houses, identification documents, dissimulators, and other provisions have all been revoked, effective tomorrow. I trust you have somewhere else to go.”

“Yes.”

The numbness absorbed her words. I might have cared, if things had been different. Now it was just another loss.

“Command also agreed with me,” Ducos said, softer, “that the Mime Order has great potential. As do you.” She blew smoke through pursed lips. “You cannot do my job, Paige. It is not your calling. But you can be a valued associate of an intelligence network. We have contacts who are not intelligence officers, people who could provide Domino with vital assistance in the years to come. I convinced my superiors that you could be one of them.”

I watched her, not quite daring to believe it.

“You will not be dosed with white aster,” she went on, “and if you can provide me with proof that your organization is ready to fight, you will receive financial support. You will still be attached to the Domino Program. We can work together.” She looked me in the eye. “This is the best outcome.”

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