She shrugged, pushing at the loose strands that framed her face. “I’ve been better. It just sucks. More so now because it’s Christmas. And then New Year’s.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” she mumbled, taking the spoon I handed her.
Just like we did when we were little, we broke up our cookies into pieces and dropped them on top of our ice cream.
“You didn’t turn off the lights?” The soft glow of the Christmas tree lights cast a colorful merriness from the living room.
“I like it. It makes it feel cozy in there. Peaceful even.”
“Are you sure the couch is okay?” I bought a new fold-out couch for visits when she came up with my parents.
“For the hundredth time, yes!” she said. “I would have told you a couple of weeks ago if there was anything wrong with it.”
“I just want to make sure you’re comfortable.” We both scooped up a spoonful of creamy vanilla ice cream and a bite-size piece of Mom’s famous oatmeal cookies.
The faint scent of sugar and cinnamon floated up and hit our tongues simultaneously.
“You can’t sleep because you’re thinking about him, aren’t you?” I asked, breaking the silence.
Sav paused, her spoon halfway to her mouth. She sighed and set it down, her shoulders slumping slightly. “Yeah,” she admitted.
“You deserve so much better than him. I didn’t know him well, but you are worthy of someone who knows what he has when he has you. I hate that he hurt you, but you’re better off without him.”
“I agree.” She released a heavy sigh. “I didn’t intend to care about him as much as I did. Work and school were—are my priority. I knew he wasn’t looking for anything serious. I didn’t think I was either. I don’t know. Maybe it’s hitting me harder because I don’t have you and Hudson around to distract me as much.”
“You’re blaming me?” I asked, smiling a little.
“Well, yeah.” Her lips curved up.
“I miss you too, Sav. But don’t let some loser make you question your worth.”
“I know, I know. I look at you and Emily, at what you two have found together, and think, ‘Wow.’ You know how lucky you are, right?”
“Damn straight.”
“Seriously, Chris. She’s great. I’m so happy for you.”
“Thanks,” I said. “I’m really happy too.” As happy as I was, I knew my sister was hurting. She was doing her best not to let herbreakup ruin our time together, but her feelings were valid. Pain didn’t care who it affected.
“I’m so sick of guys. Why don’t things work out?”
“Savannah, I’m the last person to ask.”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t—shit. I know you were dealt a crappy set of cards, Chris.”
“You know you’re the one who got me through it. Mom and Dad did their best, and I couldn’t have done it without them either. But you? You were exactly who I needed after Kayla died.”
“Who would’ve thought that as much as we fought when we were little, that we’d end up being this close?”
“Mom,” I said. “You know she used to tell me not to be so mean to you because one day you would be my best friend.” I chuckled as my mom’s words echoed in the back of my mind. “And I’m glad she was right, Savannah. You are my best friend.”
Savannah pitched forward and hugged me. She rested her chin on my shoulder; the familiar weight reminded me of all the times I’d comforted her when we were younger. “I love you, big brother.”
“I love you too.”
“Thank you,” she said when she pulled away and scooped another spoonful of cookie and ice cream into her mouth.