Page 54 of A Night to Remember

“Your sad fucking face,” he says smugly.

“Your face would be sad, too, if you were actually watching this game,” I tell him, trying to change the subject.

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you, little bro. She got what she wanted, and now she’s gone. I just hope you didn’t spend too much money on her.”

I shoot him a furious glance. The house is full of extended family and friends. At least twenty little kids, including Adam’s, are running around flinging Nerf footballs at each other. It’s hardly the place to start a brawl.

But I want to. I want to punch Adam in the teeth, because Ihavebeen seeing less of Kayla since her mediation meeting.I know she’s working as hard as ever, looking for jobs, and planning the next phase of her life. I’ve been busy, too, between my job and helping my mom tie up Hungry Hearts-related loose ends. But I can’t shake the feeling that Kayla’s been avoiding me.

It’s not because she was using me. I feel certain of that. And I believed her, mostly, when she said she wasn’t seeing anybody else. But not being in touch is exhuming all of the anger and confusion I felt when she ignored me after graduation. I’m trying to give her the benefit of the doubt, but it’s hard.

Meanwhile, Gretchen Meier is back in town. I felt her presence like a disturbance in the Force—and also I ran into her when our families were leaving church this morning. We’d exchanged pleasantries, and though she looked as pretty as ever, I realized that I’m no longer attracted to her. Before she arrived, I have to admit that part of me was thinkingwhat if. What if I had been able to forget Kayla, what if Gretchen and I had gotten married, what if we had started a family? Wouldn’t that have been better, in some ways?

But now I know I’m doomed. Doomed to pine for Kayla forever, whether she wants to keep me around or throw me away. To be her friend-with-benefits instead of the father of her children. The way she’d held me after her mediation meeting, the feeling of her heart beating against mine—even if she hadn’t meant anything by it, she sealed my fate.

I’d given Gretchen’s engagement ring back to my dad that very evening. I’d been relieved when he’d merely asked me, in a serious voice, whether I was sure. I promised him I was.

And now I haven’t seen Kayla in three days. And yeah, okay, it’s making me a little pissy. I would prefer it if Adam didn’t rub it in.

“Just mind your own business,” I mutter.

“You’ve always been like this, you know,” Adam continues, pointing at me with his beer bottle. “You let women walk all overyou. Take it from a married man. They’ll only respect you if you grow some balls, show ‘em who’s boss.”

I scoff at this, because there’s not a doubt in my mind that Lucy holds the reins in their relationship. I keep my mouth shut, though, and turn my attention back to the game.

“I won’t always be around to protect you,” he says. Is this his third beer, or his fourth? “I could talk to Kayla, sure, butnexttime?—”

“What do you mean?” I ask, snapping my head in his direction. “What do you mean, you could talk to Kayla?Didyou talk to Kayla?”

“No, no, we just had a polite chat about how she should leave my little brother alone. Find someone who’s more on her level. Like that tweaker cook.” He chuckles unpleasantly.

I leap up from the couch, adrenaline pounding through my body like I’m about to tackle a 200-pound running back. Adam’s body tenses. He watches me closely, but doesn’t get up.

“Did you talk to her at work?” I ask, trying to keep my voice under control.

“What’s it to you?” He looks at the TV, feigning indifference. “Whoa, touchdown!”

For once I couldn’t care less about football. I hear my relatives cheer around me, but it feels like they’re miles away. All my senses are trained on Adam. In a calmer moment, I might have argued that my brother is not such a terrible guy—macho, yes, controlling, yes, but also big-hearted and loyal to a fault—but this is not that moment. Now, as I stare at the features that are so much like mine, I feel nothing but hatred. How could he have poured salt on this particular wound? How could he have tried to convince the girl whose loss devastated me all those years ago to stay away from meagain?

I choose my next words very carefully. I want to make absolutely sure that my intuition is correct. “Did the head chef tell you to leave her alone?”

“Yes, okay?” He glances at me briefly. “What is the big fucking deal? Did you just see Valdes-Scantling score?”

My control snaps. “Youson of a bitch!” I shout. I lunge at him just as he jumps up, dodging my outstretched arms and upsetting the coffee table in the process. Neither of us lands many blows before assorted male relatives pull us apart. Voices all around me try to soothe or scold us, but I barely hear them because I can finally see the whole truth, clear as day, in my mind.

Adam must have followed Kayla down the corridor to the kitchen the same way I did. He told her to stay away from me, and she—well, she must have refused, right? I can’t imagine that she meekly submitted to him. And she had, in fact, continued to see me. And their interaction must have been heated enough that Jeff came out to investigate, just like he did the dayIcame to see her. And she hid this from me for weeks because…

Because she didn’t want to come between me and my family.

Because she wanted to protect me.

Because she loves me.

“Gabriel!” My father’s voice finally breaks through. “Can you please tell me what this isabout?”

I open my mouth to reply, but Adam speaks first.

“She won’t even go to Hungry Hearts with you, will she?Will she?” he shouts, shrugging off the hands that are holding him. He has a bruise forming on one cheekbone where my fist grazed his face.

---