Page 43 of The Broken Queen

“You okay?” Anna’s concerned gaze was looking through me, trying to find answers. She may have been the closest thing I had to a friend, but I didn’t trust her. She worked for Father, she couldn’t know that I was looking into Father, trying to figure out who killed Mother.

I swallowed. “I’m good, I think I’m ready to go home though. Kind of tired.”

Her eyes brightened, “Of course! We’ve been gone all day and you are still trying to recover. I’m sure Julianna would love to see her mom too. Let’s go.”

I grabbed my purse, the bear, and coffee and followed her to the door. All the while thinking about what she said, knowing she was right.

I did have to tell Slade how I felt, but the outcome wouldn’t be pretty.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Slade

I paced the floor of my office, casually glancing at the journal on the desk, debating whether or not I should open it. I knew I needed to read it. There were so many missing pieces to the puzzle. I needed to get under Lars’s skin, figure out a way to crack the code so I could take him down, for good. Then there was the other issue, dealing with his dumbass little minion.

I rubbed a hand over my face.Why was this so hard? Why couldn’t I just open it up and read it?Deep down I knew why. I couldn’t open it up because it would make me feel all kinds of things towards Raven. Knowing what she suffered was bound to leave me a fucked up mess.

There was a barrier that I had put up around my heart to protect myself from her talons. I couldn’t let that down. After I had put a hole in the floor, I eventually said fuck it and sat down with the journal. I flipped to the first page and started reading.

Page one...Training. Otherwise known as Hell on Earth. “Pull the trigger, Raven.” The gun rattled in my shaky hands. Tears streamed down my cheeks, slowly falling to my plain white t-shirt. “I don’t want to, Daddy!”

My lips trembled as my gaze roamed to the man who tried to kidnap me. I didn’t know who he was. I didn’t know his name, how old he was, or if he had a family. This whole scene was too orchestrated. He was an unwilling sacrifice in the twisted games Father liked to play. He was handcuffed to the chair, slouched over, barely breathing. His head rolled from side to side, until finally, his blue eyes met mine. They werepleading for another chance that Father no longer wanted to give.

The gun fell to my side, and I closed my eyes when the whip connected with his skin again. My stomach churned when the connection with his skin made a harsh cracking sound. A shudder went through my body. I couldn’t imagine being whipped. It was a cruel punishment, and being in the same room as this was happening made me want to throw up. His screams pierced through the walls, awakening every prisoner Father had rotting in the dungeon, awaiting their doomed destiny. A sob escaped my throat when my eyes opened. His pale flesh was sliced open from the repeated action, with blood threatening to pour out of the wounds. A metallic smell invaded my nostrils and made me gag. How is this man my father? How could he do this to another human being?

I took a few hesitant steps forward until I was standing directly in front of him and swallowed the lump in my throat. I can’t do this... I’m gonna be sick. My trembling hands raised the gun and pointed it at his head, my pointer finger taking its place on the trigger. Maybe I should just put him out of his misery. Isn’t that what they did with poor animals who weren’t doing well? The thought made me sick. Taking a deep breath, I licked the salt from my lips and met his gaze once more.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered and squeezed my eyes shut. Anything to make this nightmare disappear. My finger pulled the trigger. Bang! Bang! The noise was so loud and unwelcome that it was overwhelming to my ears. The gun dropped from my hand to the concrete and I fell back. My butt landed with a thud on the ground and my vibrating hands wrapped around my knees as I rocked back and forth. A cough escaped my lips as the smell of powder wafted into my nose, making me choke on the stench. I just took someone’s life. Oh my God... I just took someone’s life.

I flipped the book over and put my head in my hands. She was twelve when she was forced to murder someone. I grabbed the bottle of whiskey from my drawer as well as a small glass, and took the top off. I poured the liquid until it filled to the brim, then poured it down my throat. I did it again until I started to feel some of its loosening effects. This journal was going to be harder to read than I thought. I needed all the liquid courage I could get to shut down my emotions.

She was twelve. Her father was so cruel and cold fucking hearted that he made her murder someone in cold blood. I didn’t think the King had it in him to be so demented, but he really was the devil’s advocate. When this was all over, he could rot in Hell for all I cared.

I turned the journal back over and just read. I read for hours and hours and drank so much whiskey that I wanted to puke. The things she had been through, the abuse she had taken. I started thinking back to the day she found me. If I hadn’t helped her escape, she would’ve still been in the dungeon, suffering.

After reading what I had read, I wasn’t sure the King was ever planning to let her out. It sounded to me that he wasn’t preparing her to be a Queen. He was preparing her to be sold off to the highest bidder, so he wouldn’t have to worry about her anymore.

There was one part in the journal, the part that got to me the most, was the rape. How that mother fucker put his hands on her, how he threatened her and my daughter. My hands curled into fists— I was going tokillhim.How could Lars be so cruel? Cruel enough that he was letting a rapist marry his daughter?I already didn’t like the guy, but after reading about what he did to Raven, I didn’t want him anywhere near her.

More and more, I was putting the pieces together. Her journal was helping me piece together some holes that were missing. It was no wonder why she was so fucking broken. Shehad been through hell and back literally, and was still living through it every goddamn day.

I knew that once I opened the journal, there would be no going back. It detailed everything; her training, the feelings about us finally being together, our daughter being born, me being taken away by the cops, her fights with her father, all leading up to the rape. Then there were several empty pages, some with entries from just a few days ago.

I went back to the pages detailing what happened when I was taken away by the cops and reread what was there.

I sat there for what seemed like hours after Slade was taken away. I could hear Julianna’s cries for me in the distance, but I was too catatonic to move. I remembered Lewis coming by, shaking me, trying to get me to move. I saw him walk out with Julianna, probably to take her to Anna.

There was a pain in my heart watching her being taken away, but I knew she would be okay. The only thing I could focus on was that they took the love of my life away from me.

I swallowed the lump in my throat. How could he think...how could he think that I would do something so horrible to him? I’d suffered so much in my lifetime. Slade was my savior. I wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize that.

My stomach twisted, and I wanted to puke. There had to be a way out of this. I would get him out of this. My brain started piecing things together. Who would frame him? Did someone hate him so much? Hate me?

Then I started thinking back through everything. My training, the way Father disliked Slade and I being together. He had always said he wanted someone who was “fit” for the crown to be by my side, and that made me wonder if he had something to do with this.

Would he be that much of an asshole to take away his daughter’s happiness? To take away his granddaughter’s father?

The words were cut off shortly after that. My eyes blinked, and I tried to process what I had just read. I rubbed the nape of my neck. I was wrong...I had blamed her when she wasn’t the one to frame me. Reading her point of view made that more clear. She was just as confused and hurt as I was.How could I blame her for that? How could I break up with her like that, knowing we had a daughter to raise together?

---